Laff-A-Lympics: The Colonial Challenge
by Count Mallet
Summary: The Laff-A-Lympic teams compete in a virtual mini-season with venues in each of the 13 US colonial states, followed by an awards ceremony in Washington DC. Who will make history, and who will go down in infamy? Rated K-Plus for campy puns and humor with no objectionable content. Originally posted to Fanfiction·net. [S57-F47-M24]
1. New Hampshire & Massachusetts

Written in 2017.

All rights reserved. Except for reviewers quoting brief passages in a review, no part of this work may be reproduced without permission of the author.

Some characters and events in this story are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

Second Edition (2019-07)

* * *

 **Acknowledgments**

Very special thanks to Hanna-Barbera for the _Laff-A-Lympics_ show and characters contained therein.

Also, thanks to the International Olympic Committee for the Olympic Games that serve as the basis for this story.

I used both OpenOffice Calc and the website random·org to generate the various random numbers used to determine the random events throughout this story.

⁂

 **Preface**

Having enjoyed writing my previous _Laff-A-Lympics_ story. I decided to write another one to be posted on or around the Winter 2018 Olympic Games. Similar to the original show, my second season will also be shorter. However, I hope this story will be as entertaining as its predecessor. I will once again use a modern-day setting, so expect more mock social media posts after every competition.

For anyone that hasn't read _The Global Games_ , I use random numbers to help determine each event's outcome. This eliminates any biases I may have, and it challenges me to come up with a plausible sequence of events leading to the selected outcome.

Additionally, I'll continue using _all italics_ to represent the off-screen announcer's commentary. This eliminates the need to clutter up the story with direct quotes for his parts.

For this season of competition, teams will be ranked first by points, then by their competition finishes. For example, two second place finishes would be better than one second place and one third place finish. If that somehow doesn't break the tie, I will decide what additional criteria to use and announce it if and only if it's necessary.

Finally, my intentions are to be as original as possible with events and venues. Because the possibilities for each are finite, there may be some similarities to events and venues appearing in both _The Global Games_ and the original show. Be assured, however, I will try to keep such repetition to a minimum.

* * *

"Heavens to hi-jinks! Is it really that time again?" Snagglepuss asked.

 _Indeed, it is, Snagglepuss. It's time for another exciting season of Laff-A-Lympics._

"Follow our all-star teams and their crazy competitions in the colonial states of the USA. Join the Yogi Yahooeys, the Scooby Doobies, and the Really Rottens as they experience history or go down in infamy. So, lets get started and begin, even!"

⁂

 _Welcome, sport fans one and all, to the start of a spectacular season of Laff-A-Lympics. Appropriately enough, we start our new season in New Hampshire. From there, we wrap things up in Massachusetts—including an event at Cape Cod._

"Hmm, me have cape, too," Captain Caveman interjected.

 _Right. Well, our teams are eager to get started, so let's go to Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf who are ready to tell us more about the inaugural event._

"Snag, I don't know how you do it, but you always manage to talk me out of retirement to help you serve these savages," Mildew stated.

"We're so inseparable, Mildew. Like two peas in a pod... like oil and vinegar, even."

"I'm going to regret this, aren't I?"

"Don't say that, Mildew. Every time we do these games, it's always a unique experience—a one of a kind adventure, even."

"I have to admit you're right. Oh, that reminds me. The Yogis' roster has more players than either of their opponents' roster. So, each day, they will be sitting three of their players to make things more even. Today, those players will be Cindy, Mr. Jinks, and Quick Draw McGraw."

"Will it make a difference? Let's find out with our first event. Earlier, our teams were asked to make their own rowboats. Let's see who will be rowing, and what they made, for our boat race in Laconia's Paugus Bay."

"I see I have the honors of introducing the teams again," Mildew stated. "I can hardly wait. First, let's check in with the Yogis. It looks like team captains will race with a teammate because Yogi and Doggie Daddy will race in their Styrofoam rowboat. Gentlemen, maybe I missed something, but I thought teams were going to be Eco-friendly with this event."

"Well, Mildew," Doggie Daddy replied, "we didn't have much time, so we used the first thing that we found that could float."

"That actually makes sense. Maybe things **will** be different this season. Over here, we have the Scoobies. And they have quite the duo competing with captain Scooby Doo and his kooky cousin, Scooby Dun."

"Dum dum dum dum!" Scooby Dum sang.

"I'm beginning to think that, myself. But your recycled wood boat with cardboard and carpet is quite impressive—let's hope it floats."

Scooby Doo chuckled at Mildew's comments.

Over here, we have the Rottens. Mumbly and Mrs. Creepley appear to be using a vintage bathtub? Are they planning to clean up their act?"

"Of course not, dah-ling," Mrs. Creepley answered. "We had this sitting around doing nothing, so I thought we'd put it to good use. Besides, it's a good swimmer."

"Bathtubs swim?" Mildew asked in disbelief.

"See the legs on it? It could paddle itself if it wanted to, but we have to do it, no thanks to your silly rules."

"I'm not sure what's stranger, these events or the people entering them."

 _As our teams prepare to launch their ships, we remind our fans that first place will receive the customary 25 points. We'll also award 15 for second and ten for third. Cheating is subject to penalties, and the leader after four events wins the highly-acclaimed and ever-sought Laff-A-Lympics Gold Medal._

All teams and assembled spectators cheered.

After the sound of a foghorn and chain, Snagglepuss said, "If that's not my stomach from today's seafood delight, it's probably the starting signal. So, sail on!"

 _And our teams are off. The Rottens get the quick start out of the gate as Mumbly and Mrs. Creepley row their bathtub boat. The Scoobies settle into second place with their recycled rowboat. Meanwhile, the Yogis are back in the pack._

The camera zoomed in on Yogi and Doggie Daddy bouncing along with the waves in their Styrofoam boat.

"I think we're a little too light, and that doesn't seem right," Yogi said.

"Don't worry, Yogi," Doggie replied, pulling out his smart phone. "I have just the thing to help us out."

Although the boat stopped bouncing as much, making it easier for Yogi to roll, the sounds coming from the phone annoyed him.

"That noise sure annoys me. What is it?"

"The solution to our problems, Yogi. It's heavy metal."

Yogi shook his head in disbelief.

 _As we check the leaders, the Rottens have moved into a big lead over the Scoobies. What's this? The Rottens are playing cards? Why would they do that?_

"Pshaw! We're in the lead so we can afford to take it easy. Those goody goods don't stand a chance against us," Mrs. Creepley answered. "Right, Mumbly?"

Mumbly snickered in reply.

 _But what_ ** _are_** _you playing?_

"Bathtub gin—what else?"

Before anyone could react, Mumbly laid down the rest of his cards and snickered. Mrs. Creepley gnashed her teeth upon seeing Mumbly win the hand.

 _As we reach the final straightaway, the Yogis are just behind the Scoobies who have narrowed the gap with the Rottens. As shocking as this is to say, the Rottens have made no attempts at cheating, and it looks like they may actually win._

"Don't look now, kids, this isn't a pretty sight," Mrs. Creepley said.

Mumbly whined and pointed.

"What now? What..."

Mrs. Creepley's question ended abruptly as their bathtub collided with a buoy marking the course. Their bathtub boat spun around from the impact, allowing the other teams to pass them.

"Oh boy, I didn't expect that," she deadpanned. "OK, you beastly bathtub. Start swimming. We need to catch back up!"

 _As we reach the finish line, the Scoobies finish just half a boat length ahead of the Yogis. The all-Scooby squad actually won._

"Scooby Dooby Do!" Scooby called out.

"Dum Dum Dum Dum," his cousin added.

 _Despite their frantic efforts, the Rottens finish third. So, let's check the early scoreboard. The Scoobies get 25 points for first and the lead. The Yogis get 15 for their close, second-place finish. And the Rottens settle for ten points._

Some Rottens howled and catcalled in disgust.

⁂

"Snag, I have to confess that wasn't so bad," Mildew said. "Do you think every event will be like that?"

"If only, Mildew. If only," Snagglepuss answered. "We're now in Concord, and our next event is one of skill—an old carnival favorite, even. Our teams will have one player toss three balls to see how many land inside a milk jug."

"No fair clowning around guys."

"Remember, leave the puns to a professional. Let's meet our players. We have Huck Hound for the Yogis."

"I've been told I have perfect pitch. Let's see if that's true today," Huck told Snagglepuss.

"We'll see. Indeed, we will. Next, for the Scoobies, we have that terrific Teen Angel—Taffy Dare."

"I've never done anything like this before. I hope it's fun."

"We'll see if you feel that way after the event. Finally, for the Rottens, we have the diminutive Dirty Dalton."

"I may be tiny, but I'm big enough to compete with anyone here. You'll see!" Dirty exclaimed.

Elsewhere, Dread Baron and Mumbly hatched their latest scheme.

"When Dirty takes his turn, nobody will know we replaced the softballs with these hollowed out kiddie balls that are lighter and easier to throw," Dread stated.

Mumbly pointed and snickered.

 _Each team will receive their points based on how many balls they successful toss into its jug. In the event of a tie, teams will receive equal points. First up, we have Huckleberry Hound for the Yogis._

As Huck's first toss overshot the jug, he shrugged his shoulder and said, "I guess I **don't** have perfect pitch, huh?"

Undaunted, he managed to score his next two tosses.

 _Next, we have Taffy for the Scoobies._

Taffy looked at the jug and carefully tossed her first ball. To her surprise, it entered, drawing cheers from both her teammates and Taffy herself.

She then proceeded to score her next two tosses, although the last one looked as if it may bounce off the lip of the jug.

 _Taffy has seemingly earned the top spot, but Dirty Dalton now has a chance to tie for the Rottens._

Dirty attempted his first toss only to see the ball sail well past the jug.

"Hmm, I guess I don't know my own strength," he remarked.

In making his second toss, his softer throw came up well short of the jug.

"Now I look like a wimp. I have to score at least one here."

Dirty's third and final attempt looked as if it might score, but it bounced off the jug and away from it.

 _The Rottens have rotten luck and have no score for this event._

"You, know, something doesn't seem right here. Can we get a review?" Mildew asked.

 _Of course, we can. As we review footage on our hidden internet cameras, we see the Rottens attempting to cheat with less-than-regulation softballs! The Rottens cheated."_

"That was a rotten thing to do!" Dynomutt exclaimed.

 _The Rottens will have their third place finish voided and they'll be disqualified._

All the Rottens booed in disgust.

 _Let's check the scores heading into our break. The Scoobies earned 25 points. They move up to 50. The Yogis' 15 points for second doubles their score at 30. And, the Rottens get no points, leaving them stuck in the cellar at 10._

"Well, Mildew, that wasn't too bad, was it?" Snagglepuss asked.

"I suppose not," Mildew conceded. "Some things never change... but I hope my bad luck from past seasons is something that does."

"All we can do is hope as we journey to our next destination."

 _Join us for the second half of Laff-A-Lympics right after this._

⁂

 _Welcome to the second half of our all-star Laff-A-Lympics competition. We're here in marvelous Massachusetts where we'll race between Lexington and Concord and conclude the day with a bang as we fire colonial-style muskets._

 _When we finished the first half, the Scoobies led with 50 points, followed by the Yogis with 30, and the Rottens with 10._

 _Everyone is ready to continue, so let's return to Mildew and Snagglepuss._

"Thanks," Mildew said. "As part of our salute to America history, our teams will participate in a horse race covering the 18 miles [29 km] between Lexington and Concord."

"That's not all," Snagglepuss added. "For our remaining events, we're pleased to have a special guest judge—Paul Revere himself."

"Thank you having me," Paul replied. "I find the idea of this competition rather intriguing, but I'm happy to assist you in your endeavors."

"Why don't you tell everyone about the race."

"There's not much to say, strange fellow. The first person to arrive in Concord will win your race. But the best part is we won't have to worry about any regulars."

"Just the Rottens," Mildew interjected.

"Fear not, I'll be vigilant as you requested and inform you of any dishonorable gamesmanship."

"Well, here's the part where I have to introduce our racers. We have Hokey Wolf riding a tricycle."

"Thanks, Mildew. Us wolves are known for roaming long distances, so I hope I have a chance," Hokey told the audience.

"That makes sense. Next, it looks like we have Captain Caveman and a boulder wheel. I swear I've seen that somewhere before. But it's so prehistorically simple, it might actually work."

Captain Caveman grunted and finally said, "This way me roll."

"I always wondered if he has rocks in his head. Oh, no! For the Rottens, it's going to be the Great Fondoo with a motor scooter."

"I look forward to showing you what I can do, Mildew," Fondoo stated, adding a devious grin.

The Magic Rabbit popped out of Fondoo's hat and said, "Brack!"

"Gather around, so you can hear the rules," Paul Revere told the racers. "All you have to do is finish first and you'll win whatever prize is customary. But be aware, we'll be watching for any tomfoolery."

As usual, the Rottens groaned and catcalled. The complaints didn't last long, however. The bugle call signaling the start of the race sounded.

 _And our teams are off. Captain Caveman has rolled off to the early lead, but I'm sure it won't be all smooth sailing._

Captain Caveman growled and said, "Me not have boat!"

 _It's only an expression. Behind him, Hokey and Fondoo are neck and neck—or is it neck and snout—as they battle for second place._

Fondoo gestured and said, "Observe. I'll make Hokey all slow pokey. Alla kazam, alla kazout. Slow down Hokey from tail to snout!"

A puff of smoke appeared, but Hokey briefly passed Fondoo.

"What went wrong this time?" Fondoo asked.

"What happened is your magic failed again. Not only did you speed Hokey up, you gave him an in-race snack."

 _As we look at Hokey, he moves into second place—and he has a trout stuck in his mouth!_

Removing it, Hokey replied, "I thought something was fishy." He then continued to pedal his tricycle.

 _Ladies and gentleman, we've fast forwarded to the last portion of the race for time constraints. In an unexpected turn of events, Captain Caveman had a mishap, costing him the lead. He's now battling for second place with Hokey as Fondoo has somehow taken over the lead without cheating._

"That's because his magic isn't cheating. It's so awful it only cheats himself and that savage rabbit of his," Mildew muttered.

 _Captain Caveman has taken the lead over Hokey for second and he's closing in on Fondoo. This is going to be an amazing finish. Fondoo spots Cavey trying to win and tries to stretch his hand out towards the finish line. Now, Captain Caveman grabs his club and tries to extend it past Fondoo._

 _There's the finish, but I have no idea who won! Both teams are cheering as if they won, but that can't be the case, can it? Do we have a tie?_

"Thankfully, we have our finish line video to answer the question for us," Snagglepuss stated.

 _Right you are, Snagglepuss. Let's review the finish in slow motion. As we zoom in, we see Fondoo breaks the plane of the finish line just three hundredths of a second ahead of Captain Caveman. That gives the Rottens first place._

"Brack!" the Magic Rabbit exclaimed joyously.

Captain Caveman responded by whacking his boulder with his club, shattering it into smaller pieces.

"Uhh... better luck next time," he said.

 _Let's check out the updated scores. The Rottens amazingly get 25 points and have 35 now. The Scoobies get 15 points for their close second place finish. They move up to 65. Finally, the Yogis get 10 points for last, giving them 40._

"That was a jolly show. Nobody did anything bad, but that winner better avoid Salem. I hear they don't take kindly to his kind there," Paul Revere said.

⁂

"I'm almost sad this is the last event—almost," Mildew told the audience. "But, we're here at Cape Cod for our final event. Paul Revere has worked with our teams to teach them how to fire muskets. We'll see how well they paid attention."

"That's right," Snagglepuss added. "And with so much on the line, and in the line of fire, we're going to double the points."

Both team members and those in attendance cheered loudly.

"I did my part. The rest is up to them," Paul stated.

"For the Yogis, we have Boo Boo Bear."

"I sure wish Quick Draw was playing today, Yogi," Boo Boo said.

"Nonsense, you'll be just fine," Yogi assured his teammate. "Maybe you can shoot better than the average bear."

"For the Scoobies, we have Hong Kong Phooey," Mildew told everyone.

Hong Kong brandished his musket as he made unintelligible comments.

"And for the Rottens, we have Daisy Mayhem? I thought for sure one of the Daltons would be doing this one."

"Oh pshaw, Mildew!" Daisy exclaimed. "Just because I'm a hillbilly doesn't mean I can't shoot one of these things. I was born with a silver gun in my hand."

Mildew, seeing Daisy point the musket briefly towards him, took off and said, "Exit, stage anywhere!"

"That's my line!" Snagglepuss called out. "Each team will shoot towards a bulls-eye. The inner circle is five points. The next ring is three. The outer ring is one. Missing the target is a big goose egg... zero even. Whomever has the most points after five shots wins the points."

 _As mentioned, the points will be doubled for this event. Of course, that means we double the penalties for cheating too._

"Just once, I wish people would look at the goody-goods when he says that," Dread Baron lamented. **They've** been caught cheating, too."

 _All teams will fire their muskets when given the signal. We'll tally up their shots and determine the event and overall winners. Good luck, everybody._

At the sound of a fife and drum, Boo Boo, Hong Kong, and Daisy began to fire their muskets. Because the event wasn't timed, each team took time to carefully and properly reload their muskets between shots.

 _With the smoke cleared, let's see how each team did._

"Boo Boo hit the bulls-eye twice and the outer ring once. That's good for seven points," Snagglepuss informed everyone.

The rest of the Yogis cheered the announcement.

"Hong Kong should stick to martial arts. He only hit the bulls-eye once and the other ring once. He missed three times, but it looks like one shot missed the board completely. That gives the Scoobies four points."

Hong Kong made karate chops as the rest of his teammates applauded.

Mildew took a deep breath. "Believe it or not, the Rottens scored all five of their shots. I guess Miss Daisy really is a skilled shooter. She hit the outer ring three times and the middle ring twice. That gives her seven points, too. That's a tie, but is it legit?"

 _Before anyone else asks, let's review the tape. As we see, all three contestants were so focused on their shooting, nobody even tried to cheat. There you have it, Mildew, a clean performance by the Rottens."_

"We may be Rottens, but we're not dirty! We bathe before every competition!" Daisy exclaimed.

"Speak for yourself. I'm Dirty and proud of it," Dirty Dalton interjected.

"Oh, boy. I knew something like this would happen," Mildew groaned. "Let's get the final scores so we can call it a day."

 _Both the Rottens and the Yogis receive 50 points for their first-place tie. That gives them 85 and 90 respectively. The Scoobies receive 30 points for second, giving them 95. The tie helped them as they manage to get just enough points to win the gold!_

Scooby and the rest of his teammates cheered the news. Even the Rottens, despite finishing in last place, appeared pleased.

Paul Revere presented the medals to the Blue Falcon,Yakky Doodle, and Orful Octopus respectively. In addition, he gave the Blue Falcon a small, handmade silver gift to commemorate the occasion.

"Well, Mildew, that wasn't too painful was it?" Snagglepuss asked.

"I've seen better, but I've also seen much worse."

"We'll see if things improve next time as we continue our colonial competitions."

 _As we leave you from Cape Cod, Massachusetts, we invite you to join us next time for another exciting day of competition with the Laff-A-Lympics Colonial Challenge._

⁂

 **Mock Social Media Posts**

Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed: The Scoobies narrowly win our first #LaffALympics event of the season. Rottens just 10 points out of first.

Scoobies FacePlace Account: The Blue Falcon accepts our gold medal as we edge the Yogis, 95-90, and the Rottens, 95-85. Let's hope we can keep winning.

Rottens Stumbler Account: We tried, we cheated, we even won an event. And we only lost by ten points. Like us, reblog us, and send us inquiries. We'll get second place next time, even if we have to cheat in every single event!

⁂

 **Overall Standings**

Scooby Doobies, 95  
Yogi Yahooeys, 90  
Really Rottens, 85


	2. Rhode Island & Connecticut

Written in 2017.

All rights reserved. Except for reviewers quoting brief passages in a review, no part of this work may be reproduced without permission of the author.

Some characters and events in this story are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

First Edition

* * *

 **Acknowledgments**

Very special thanks to Hanna-Barbera for the _Laff-A-Lympics_ show and characters contained therein.

Also, thanks to the International Olympic Committee for the Olympic Games that serve as the basis for this story.

I used both OpenOffice Calc and the website random·org to generate the various random numbers used to determine the random events throughout this story.

⁂

 **Preface**

Having enjoyed writing my previous _Laff-A-Lympics_ story. I decided to write another one to be posted on or around the Winter 2018 Olympic Games. Similar to the original show, my second season will also be shorter. However, I hope this story will be as entertaining as its predecessor. I will once again use a modern-day setting, so expect more mock social media posts after every competition.

For anyone that hasn't read _The Global Games_ , I use random numbers to help determine each event's outcome. This eliminates any biases I may have, and it challenges me to come up with a plausible sequence of events leading to the selected outcome.

Additionally, I'll continue using _all italics_ to represent the off-screen announcer's commentary. This eliminates the need to clutter up the story with direct quotes for his parts.

For this season of competition, teams will be ranked first by points, then by their competition finishes. For example, two second place finishes would be better than one second place and one third place finish. If that somehow doesn't break the tie, I will decide what additional criteria to use and announce it if and only if it's necessary.

Finally, my intentions are to be as original as possible with events and venues. Because the possibilities for each are finite, there may be some similarities to events and venues appearing in both _The Global Games_ and the original show. Be assured, however, I will try to keep such repetition to a minimum.

* * *

"Heavens to hi-jinks! Is it really that time again?" Snagglepuss asked.

 _Indeed, it is, Snagglepuss. It's time for another exciting season of Laff-A-Lympics._

"Follow our all-star teams and their crazy competitions in the colonial states of the USA. Join the Yogi Yahooeys, the Scooby Doobies, and the Really Rottens as they experience history or go down in infamy. So, lets get started and begin, even!"

⁂

 _Welcome, sport fans one and all, to the start of a spectacular season of Laff-A-Lympics. Appropriately enough, we start our new season in New Hampshire. From there, we wrap things up in Massachusetts—including an event at Cape Cod._

"Hmm, me have cape, too," Captain Caveman interjected.

 _Right. Well, our teams are eager to get started, so let's go to Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf who are ready to tell us more about the inaugural event._

"Snag, I don't know how you do it, but you always manage to talk me out of retirement to help you serve these savages," Mildew stated.

"We're so inseparable, Mildew. Like two peas in a pod... like oil and vinegar, even."

"I'm going to regret this, aren't I?"

"Don't say that, Mildew. Every time we do these games, it's always a unique experience—a one of a kind adventure, even."

"I have to admit you're right. Oh, that reminds me. The Yogis' roster has more players than either of their opponents' roster. So, each day, they will be sitting three of their players to make things more even. Today, those players will be Cindy, Mr. Jinks, and Quick Draw McGraw."

"Will it make a difference? Let's find out with our first event. Earlier, our teams were asked to make their own rowboats. Let's see who will be rowing, and what they made, for our boat race in Laconia's Paugus Bay."

"I see I have the honors of introducing the teams again," Mildew stated. "I can hardly wait. First, let's check in with the Yogis. It looks like team captains will race with a teammate because Yogi and Doggie Daddy will race in their Styrofoam rowboat. Gentlemen, maybe I missed something, but I thought teams were going to be Eco-friendly with this event."

"Well, Mildew," Doggie Daddy replied, "we didn't have much time, so we used the first thing that we found that could float."

"That actually makes sense. Maybe things **will** be different this season. Over here, we have the Scoobies. And they have quite the duo competing with captain Scooby Doo and his kooky cousin, Scooby Dun."

"Dum dum dum dum!" Scooby Dum sang.

"I'm beginning to think that, myself. But your recycled wood boat with cardboard and carpet is quite impressive—let's hope it floats."

Scooby Doo chuckled at Mildew's comments.

Over here, we have the Rottens. Mumbly and Mrs. Creepley appear to be using a vintage bathtub? Are they planning to clean up their act?"

"Of course not, dah-ling," Mrs. Creepley answered. "We had this sitting around doing nothing, so I thought we'd put it to good use. Besides, it's a good swimmer."

"Bathtubs swim?" Mildew asked in disbelief.

"See the legs on it? It could paddle itself if it wanted to, but we have to do it, no thanks to your silly rules."

"I'm not sure what's stranger, these events or the people entering them."

 _As our teams prepare to launch their ships, we remind our fans that first place will receive the customary 25 points. We'll also award 15 for second and ten for third. Cheating is subject to penalties, and the leader after four events wins the highly-acclaimed and ever-sought Laff-A-Lympics Gold Medal._

All teams and assembled spectators cheered.

After the sound of a foghorn and chain, Snagglepuss said, "If that's not my stomach from today's seafood delight, it's probably the starting signal. So, sail on!"

 _And our teams are off. The Rottens get the quick start out of the gate as Mumbly and Mrs. Creepley row their bathtub boat. The Scoobies settle into second place with their recycled rowboat. Meanwhile, the Yogis are back in the pack._

The camera zoomed in on Yogi and Doggie Daddy bouncing along with the waves in their Styrofoam boat.

"I think we're a little too light, and that doesn't seem right," Yogi said.

"Don't worry, Yogi," Doggie replied, pulling out his smart phone. "I have just the thing to help us out."

Although the boat stopped bouncing as much, making it easier for Yogi to roll, the sounds coming from the phone annoyed him.

"That noise sure annoys me. What is it?"

"The solution to our problems, Yogi. It's heavy metal."

Yogi shook his head in disbelief.

 _As we check the leaders, the Rottens have moved into a big lead over the Scoobies. What's this? The Rottens are playing cards? Why would they do that?_

"Pshaw! We're in the lead so we can afford to take it easy. Those goody goods don't stand a chance against us," Mrs. Creepley answered. "Right, Mumbly?"

Mumbly snickered in reply.

 _But what_ ** _are_** _you playing?_

"Bathtub gin—what else?"

Before anyone could react, Mumbly laid down the rest of his cards and snickered. Mrs. Creepley gnashed her teeth upon seeing Mumbly win the hand.

 _As we reach the final straightaway, the Yogis are just behind the Scoobies who have narrowed the gap with the Rottens. As shocking as this is to say, the Rottens have made no attempts at cheating, and it looks like they may actually win._

"Don't look now, kids, this isn't a pretty sight," Mrs. Creepley said.

Mumbly whined and pointed.

"What now? What..."

Mrs. Creepley's question ended abruptly as their bathtub collided with a buoy marking the course. Their bathtub boat spun around from the impact, allowing the other teams to pass them.

"Oh boy, I didn't expect that," she deadpanned. "OK, you beastly bathtub. Start swimming. We need to catch back up!"

 _As we reach the finish line, the Scoobies finish just half a boat length ahead of the Yogis. The all-Scooby squad actually won._

"Scooby Dooby Do!" Scooby called out.

"Dum Dum Dum Dum," his cousin added.

 _Despite their frantic efforts, the Rottens finish third. So, let's check the early scoreboard. The Scoobies get 25 points for first and the lead. The Yogis get 15 for their close, second-place finish. And the Rottens settle for ten points._

Some Rottens howled and catcalled in disgust.

⁂

"Snag, I have to confess that wasn't so bad," Mildew said. "Do you think every event will be like that?"

"If only, Mildew. If only," Snagglepuss answered. "We're now in Concord, and our next event is one of skill—an old carnival favorite, even. Our teams will have one player toss three balls to see how many land inside a milk jug."

"No fair clowning around guys."

"Remember, leave the puns to a professional. Let's meet our players. We have Huck Hound for the Yogis."

"I've been told I have perfect pitch. Let's see if that's true today," Huck told Snagglepuss.

"We'll see. Indeed, we will. Next, for the Scoobies, we have that terrific Teen Angel—Taffy Dare."

"I've never done anything like this before. I hope it's fun."

"We'll see if you feel that way after the event. Finally, for the Rottens, we have the diminutive Dirty Dalton."

"I may be tiny, but I'm big enough to compete with anyone here. You'll see!" Dirty exclaimed.

Elsewhere, Dread Baron and Mumbly hatched their latest scheme.

"When Dirty takes his turn, nobody will know we replaced the softballs with these hollowed out kiddie balls that are lighter and easier to throw," Dread stated.

Mumbly pointed and snickered.

 _Each team will receive their points based on how many balls they successful toss into its jug. In the event of a tie, teams will receive equal points. First up, we have Huckleberry Hound for the Yogis._

As Huck's first toss overshot the jug, he shrugged his shoulder and said, "I guess I **don't** have perfect pitch, huh?"

Undaunted, he managed to score his next two tosses.

 _Next, we have Taffy for the Scoobies._

Taffy looked at the jug and carefully tossed her first ball. To her surprise, it entered, drawing cheers from both her teammates and Taffy herself.

She then proceeded to score her next two tosses, although the last one looked as if it may bounce off the lip of the jug.

 _Taffy has seemingly earned the top spot, but Dirty Dalton now has a chance to tie for the Rottens._

Dirty attempted his first toss only to see the ball sail well past the jug.

"Hmm, I guess I don't know my own strength," he remarked.

In making his second toss, his softer throw came up well short of the jug.

"Now I look like a wimp. I have to score at least one here."

Dirty's third and final attempt looked as if it might score, but it bounced off the jug and away from it.

 _The Rottens have rotten luck and have no score for this event._

"You, know, something doesn't seem right here. Can we get a review?" Mildew asked.

 _Of course, we can. As we review footage on our hidden internet cameras, we see the Rottens attempting to cheat with less-than-regulation softballs! The Rottens cheated."_

"That was a rotten thing to do!" Dynomutt exclaimed.

 _The Rottens will have their third place finish voided and they'll be disqualified._

All the Rottens booed in disgust.

 _Let's check the scores heading into our break. The Scoobies earned 25 points. They move up to 50. The Yogis' 15 points for second doubles their score at 30. And, the Rottens get no points, leaving them stuck in the cellar at 10._

"Well, Mildew, that wasn't too bad, was it?" Snagglepuss asked.

"I suppose not," Mildew conceded. "Some things never change... but I hope my bad luck from past seasons is something that does."

"All we can do is hope as we journey to our next destination."

 _Join us for the second half of Laff-A-Lympics right after this._

⁂

 _Welcome to the second half of our all-star Laff-A-Lympics competition. We're here in marvelous Massachusetts where we'll race between Lexington and Concord and conclude the day with a bang as we fire colonial-style muskets._

 _When we finished the first half, the Scoobies led with 50 points, followed by the Yogis with 30, and the Rottens with 10._

 _Everyone is ready to continue, so let's return to Mildew and Snagglepuss._

"Thanks," Mildew said. "As part of our salute to America history, our teams will participate in a horse race covering the 18 miles [29 km] between Lexington and Concord."

"That's not all," Snagglepuss added. "For our remaining events, we're pleased to have a special guest judge—Paul Revere himself."

"Thank you having me," Paul replied. "I find the idea of this competition rather intriguing, but I'm happy to assist you in your endeavors."

"Why don't you tell everyone about the race."

"There's not much to say, strange fellow. The first person to arrive in Concord will win your race. But the best part is we won't have to worry about any regulars."

"Just the Rottens," Mildew interjected.

"Fear not, I'll be vigilant as you requested and inform you of any dishonorable gamesmanship."

"Well, here's the part where I have to introduce our racers. We have Hokey Wolf riding a tricycle."

"Thanks, Mildew. Us wolves are known for roaming long distances, so I hope I have a chance," Hokey told the audience.

"That makes sense. Next, it looks like we have Captain Caveman and a boulder wheel. I swear I've seen that somewhere before. But it's so prehistorically simple, it might actually work."

Captain Caveman grunted and finally said, "This way me roll."

"I always wondered if he has rocks in his head. Oh, no! For the Rottens, it's going to be the Great Fondoo with a motor scooter."

"I look forward to showing you what I can do, Mildew," Fondoo stated, adding a devious grin.

The Magic Rabbit popped out of Fondoo's hat and said, "Brack!"

"Gather around, so you can hear the rules," Paul Revere told the racers. "All you have to do is finish first and you'll win whatever prize is customary. But be aware, we'll be watching for any tomfoolery."

As usual, the Rottens groaned and catcalled. The complaints didn't last long, however. The bugle call signaling the start of the race sounded.

 _And our teams are off. Captain Caveman has rolled off to the early lead, but I'm sure it won't be all smooth sailing._

Captain Caveman growled and said, "Me not have boat!"

 _It's only an expression. Behind him, Hokey and Fondoo are neck and neck—or is it neck and snout—as they battle for second place._

Fondoo gestured and said, "Observe. I'll make Hokey all slow pokey. Alla kazam, alla kazout. Slow down Hokey from tail to snout!"

A puff of smoke appeared, but Hokey briefly passed Fondoo.

"What went wrong this time?" Fondoo asked.

"What happened is your magic failed again. Not only did you speed Hokey up, you gave him an in-race snack."

 _As we look at Hokey, he moves into second place—and he has a trout stuck in his mouth!_

Removing it, Hokey replied, "I thought something was fishy." He then continued to pedal his tricycle.

 _Ladies and gentleman, we've fast forwarded to the last portion of the race for time constraints. In an unexpected turn of events, Captain Caveman had a mishap, costing him the lead. He's now battling for second place with Hokey as Fondoo has somehow taken over the lead without cheating._

"That's because his magic isn't cheating. It's so awful it only cheats himself and that savage rabbit of his," Mildew muttered.

 _Captain Caveman has taken the lead over Hokey for second and he's closing in on Fondoo. This is going to be an amazing finish. Fondoo spots Cavey trying to win and tries to stretch his hand out towards the finish line. Now, Captain Caveman grabs his club and tries to extend it past Fondoo._

 _There's the finish, but I have no idea who won! Both teams are cheering as if they won, but that can't be the case, can it? Do we have a tie?_

"Thankfully, we have our finish line video to answer the question for us," Snagglepuss stated.

 _Right you are, Snagglepuss. Let's review the finish in slow motion. As we zoom in, we see Fondoo breaks the plane of the finish line just three hundredths of a second ahead of Captain Caveman. That gives the Rottens first place._

"Brack!" the Magic Rabbit exclaimed joyously.

Captain Caveman responded by whacking his boulder with his club, shattering it into smaller pieces.

"Uhh... better luck next time," he said.

 _Let's check out the updated scores. The Rottens amazingly get 25 points and have 35 now. The Scoobies get 15 points for their close second place finish. They move up to 65. Finally, the Yogis get 10 points for last, giving them 40._

"That was a jolly show. Nobody did anything bad, but that winner better avoid Salem. I hear they don't take kindly to his kind there," Paul Revere said.

⁂

"I'm almost sad this is the last event—almost," Mildew told the audience. "But, we're here at Cape Cod for our final event. Paul Revere has worked with our teams to teach them how to fire muskets. We'll see how well they paid attention."

"That's right," Snagglepuss added. "And with so much on the line, and in the line of fire, we're going to double the points."

Both team members and those in attendance cheered loudly.

"I did my part. The rest is up to them," Paul stated.

"For the Yogis, we have Boo Boo Bear."

"I sure wish Quick Draw was playing today, Yogi," Boo Boo said.

"Nonsense, you'll be just fine," Yogi assured his teammate. "Maybe you can shoot better than the average bear."

"For the Scoobies, we have Hong Kong Phooey," Mildew told everyone.

Hong Kong brandished his musket as he made unintelligible comments.

"And for the Rottens, we have Daisy Mayhem? I thought for sure one of the Daltons would be doing this one."

"Oh pshaw, Mildew!" Daisy exclaimed. "Just because I'm a hillbilly doesn't mean I can't shoot one of these things. I was born with a silver gun in my hand."

Mildew, seeing Daisy point the musket briefly towards him, took off and said, "Exit, stage anywhere!"

"That's my line!" Snagglepuss called out. "Each team will shoot towards a bulls-eye. The inner circle is five points. The next ring is three. The outer ring is one. Missing the target is a big goose egg... zero even. Whomever has the most points after five shots wins the points."

 _As mentioned, the points will be doubled for this event. Of course, that means we double the penalties for cheating too._

"Just once, I wish people would look at the goody-goods when he says that," Dread Baron lamented. **They've** been caught cheating, too."

 _All teams will fire their muskets when given the signal. We'll tally up their shots and determine the event and overall winners. Good luck, everybody._

At the sound of a fife and drum, Boo Boo, Hong Kong, and Daisy began to fire their muskets. Because the event wasn't timed, each team took time to carefully and properly reload their muskets between shots.

 _With the smoke cleared, let's see how each team did._

"Boo Boo hit the bulls-eye twice and the outer ring once. That's good for seven points," Snagglepuss informed everyone.

The rest of the Yogis cheered the announcement.

"Hong Kong should stick to martial arts. He only hit the bulls-eye once and the other ring once. He missed three times, but it looks like one shot missed the board completely. That gives the Scoobies four points."

Hong Kong made karate chops as the rest of his teammates applauded.

Mildew took a deep breath. "Believe it or not, the Rottens scored all five of their shots. I guess Miss Daisy really is a skilled shooter. She hit the outer ring three times and the middle ring twice. That gives her seven points, too. That's a tie, but is it legit?"

 _Before anyone else asks, let's review the tape. As we see, all three contestants were so focused on their shooting, nobody even tried to cheat. There you have it, Mildew, a clean performance by the Rottens."_

"We may be Rottens, but we're not dirty! We bathe before every competition!" Daisy exclaimed.

"Speak for yourself. I'm Dirty and proud of it," Dirty Dalton interjected.

"Oh, boy. I knew something like this would happen," Mildew groaned. "Let's get the final scores so we can call it a day."

 _Both the Rottens and the Yogis receive 50 points for their first-place tie. That gives them 85 and 90 respectively. The Scoobies receive 30 points for second, giving them 95. The tie helped them as they manage to get just enough points to win the gold!_

Scooby and the rest of his teammates cheered the news. Even the Rottens, despite finishing in last place, appeared pleased.

Paul Revere presented the medals to the Blue Falcon,Yakky Doodle, and Orful Octopus respectively. In addition, he gave the Blue Falcon a small, handmade silver gift to commemorate the occasion.

"Well, Mildew, that wasn't too painful was it?" Snagglepuss asked.

"I've seen better, but I've also seen much worse."

"We'll see if things improve next time as we continue our colonial competitions."

 _As we leave you from Cape Cod, Massachusetts, we invite you to join us next time for another exciting day of competition with the Laff-A-Lympics Colonial Challenge._

⁂

 **Mock Social Media Posts**

Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed: The Scoobies narrowly win our first #LaffALympics event of the season. Rottens just 10 points out of first.

Scoobies FacePlace Account: The Blue Falcon accepts our gold medal as we edge the Yogis, 95-90, and the Rottens, 95-85. Let's hope we can keep winning.

Rottens Stumbler Account: We tried, we cheated, we even won an event. And we only lost by ten points. Like us, reblog us, and send us inquiries. We'll get second place next time, even if we have to cheat in every single event!

⁂

 **Overall Standings**

Scooby Doobies, 95  
Yogi Yahooeys, 90  
Really Rottens, 85


	3. New York & New Jersey

_Greetings, one and all, to today's Laff-A-Lympics competition. Our events are best described as new because we'll start in the state of New York before wrapping up with a jaunt to New Jersey._

 _As we eagerly wait to see if the Yogi Yahooeys, the Scooby Doobies, or the Really Rottens come out victorious, we turn things over to our roving reporters: Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf._

"Thanks," Mildew replied. "We've been lucky so far, so we'll see if our luck continues in the big apple. Let's just hope we don't run into any big worms."

"Worms will be the least of anyone's problems in our opening event," Snagglepuss replied. "We'll be opening up with the Central Park Challenge. Each team will have two racers run through Central Park as they navigate their way to finish line. Just watch out for dirty droppings—dog poo even!"

"If it was in my script, I might say this race sounds like it might stink—or smell that way."

"Thankfully, I get all the puns today. Our announcer will explain the scoring."

 _Thanks, Snagglepuss. A team's final score will be based on the final placing of_ _ **both**_ _runners. If a team's runners finish first and fourth, they'd receive five points. The lowest point total wins._

"First, the Yogis have chosen to rest Hokey Wolf, Yakky Doodle and Super Snooper. Racing for them will be that nice pair of mice, Pixie and Dixie."

The Yogis applauded and encouraged their teammates.

"Over here, we have Blue Falcon and Dynomutt representing the Scoobies."

"We'll soar to victory, right B.F. Buddy?" Dynomutt asked, adding a silly laugh.

"Remember we represent the Scoobies with class, Dog Wonder," Blue Falcon reminded his colleague.

"And finally, we have Dinky and Dastardly Dalton for the Rottens," Snagglepuss announced.

"We'll show those varmints what we're made of!" Dastardly exclaimed.

"That's right little brother," Dinky replied.

"And over here, we have our guest judge," Mildew said. "It's the man who purchased this land, Peter Minuit."

"I don't know what's going on, but it's nice to be here," Peter said.

"Just make sure nobody cheats during the race."

"I can do that."

 _And remember, our standard scoring awards teams 25, 15, and 10 points for first, second, and third place respectively. Deductions for cheating remain at the discretion of our judges._

"I don't think we can add any more instructions, so let's get started shall we," Snagglepuss said.

Mildew fired the starting pistol, but a sign showing the word _BANG_ appeared instead.

 _With the silent start, our teams cheer their competitors as they take off from the starting line. Everyone is even for now, but that will undoubtedly change soon enough._

As the group made it past the first midpoint, Peter carefully observed the running sextet.

"No problems here. I guess it's on to the next spot before they get there," he said.

 _As we fast forward for time constraints, we show you the leaders at the halfway mark. Dinky Dalton has used his size and massive footsteps to take the lead. Blue Falcon leads the middle of the pack, followed by Dynomutt, and Dastardly Dalton. It appears Pixie and Dixie are trailing behind._

"Come on, Dog Wonder," Blue Falcon called out, "We have to put more Falcon Effort into our running if we're to have a chance to win."

"Don't worry about me, B.F. old buddy. I'm not dogging it in this race," Dynomutt replied, adding a goofy laugh.

Peter peeked out from a garbage can to observe the midpoint.

"I don't know what's crappier: my observation point or that attempted joke," he said.

 _As we reach the three quarter mark, Dinky continues to lead. Blue Falcon and Dastardly lead the pack behind him. And I can't even find the Yogis' racers. So, who knows what's going to happen at the finish line?_

At the last straightaway, Daisy and Sooey appeared and scattered additional dog droppings on the course.

"Is that the exploding batch, Sooey?" Daisy asked.

Sooey oinked and pointed in reply.

"No, Sooey! A sign that says, 'Danger: Mine field' is a bad idea. We want this to be a surprise!"

Sooey oinked again more emphatically.

"Dinky and Dastardly already know, you silly swine. That's why we left the left hand side free. Anyways, let's get out of here!"

Peter ran towards the finish line so he could observe the finish. Unfortunately, he stepped on one of the Rottens' exploding piles of droppings.

"I know this was a bad idea," he lamented. "Next time, I stick to buying land from natives. It's what I do best."

 _And here come our runners. It appears that Dinky Dalton has won the race for the Rottens. Blue Falcon is next to cross for the Scoobies—just ahead of Dastardly. Dixie somehow manages to squeak out—err, eke out—a spot ahead of Dynomutt. But what happened to Pixie?_

"Why don't we check the super slow motion replay to check for cheats and review the finish?" Snagglepuss asked.

 _That's a good idea. As we reply the finish, we see Pixie was right behind Dinky all along! As Dinky lifted his left foot before the finish line, Pixie ran ahead of him to finish just twenty-one hundredths of a second in first place! That means everyone else moves down a space. So, our finishing order is Pixie, Dinky, Blue Falcon, Dastardly, Dixie, and Dynomutt._

"But what about cheating, and that explosion?" Mildew asked.

 _The Rottens did_ _ **not**_ _cheat in this race. Although Daisy and Sooey were responsible for the exploding dog poo, we can't penalize them because nobody was affected by the cheat except for Peter. Because he's not a racer, we can't assess a cheating a penalty._

"And, we have a tie for first. Pixie and Dixie combined for 6 points, as did Dinky and Dastardly Dalton. So, they'll have to share the 25 points. The Scoobies finished third and sixth for a total of nine points."

 _With all the out of the way, both the Yogis and the Rottens receive 25 points. The Scoobies get 15 points for second place._

"I still don't get how I lost to that measly little mousie," Dinky stated.

"Don't sweat it, Dink," Dastardly replied. "Pixie was so small, nobody knew where he was. Next time, just run a little faster, and we'll win."

"You're right, little brother."

Dread Baron felt his smart phone vibrate and checked it. He received an inquiry on the team's Stumbler account.

 _Will we see you cheat more like the old days, or have you softened up on us? – DoggyCopilot68_

Dread composed a quick reply.

 _If you haven't noticed, we have to get as many points as possible. But, if we ever find ourselves out of contention, we won't disappoint you or our other fans._

⁂

"While Peter finishes getting medical attention, I'm here to announce our next event," Snagglepuss told the audience. "Get set for the Hudson River Raft Exploring."

"Try saying that three times fast," Mildew said.

"Our teams will paddle their way down the Hudson River and end at the finishing point in Battery Park."

"How's that for a super-charged finish?"

"But that's not all. Teams will be required to take a picture of at least one significant landmark before they finish, or else they will lose five points."

"That way, we know they're paying attention, right Snag?"

"Yes, indeed. Indeed, so."

"So, who are the brave ones who plan to be historians of the Hudson?"

"Over here for the Yogis, we have Wally Gator."

"Being a water creature, I should have an advantage. But I just hope I don't run into any radioactive sludge creatures in this rancid river," Wally replied.

"For the Scoobies, we have Dee Dee Sykes."

"I've always wanted to raft. I'm so psyched up for this!" she exclaimed.

"Finally, for the Rottens, we have the team captain, Mumbly himself."

Mumbly snickered, only to have Dread Baron flick his nose.

"Now's not the time for fun and games," he chided Mumbly. "Remember our secret plan."

 _As usual, this event awards 25 points for a win. Good luck, and no cheating!_

Each contestant rowed away from the starting point. Finding an appropriate landmark **could** be a challenge, but everyone remained determined to complete the task and win the race.

As Wally looked up, he saw what looked like an old bridge—the George Washington Bridge that carried the highway US-9 between New York and New Jersey.

"I'll take this picture now and focus on my rowing to the finish line. Won't that be fine?" he commented as he took a picture.

 _Wally's picture-taking cost him the early lead, but the Scoobies and Rottens still have to take pictures before they finish rafting down the Hudson._

Dee Dee took a gradual lead ahead of Mumbly, much to the latter's chagrin.

"Razzin frazzin goody goody grazzing," he muttered.

"Never mind that!" Dread Baron shouted as if he somehow expected Mumbly to hear him. "Win that race!"

 _As we get closer to the finish line, Mumbly somehow managed to snap a picture of Pier 62 without losing any momentum. Still, he trails Dee Dee, the current leader. Wally has also joined the fray for a close race at this point. We'll see who earns the victory soon enough._

Dee Dee stopped to check her smartphone's GPS tracking.

"Hmm, these weird things on either side of me appear to mark where the Holland Tunnel is beneath me. Maybe I can take a picture of that," she said.

 _Once again, it appears we're going to have a close race. All three contestants are as close to each other as possible without declaring it a dead heat. We may have to go to the replay for this one if this keeps up. But wait, we have Wally Gator clearly crossing the finish line first for the Yogis!_

The rest of the Yogis cheered and jumped up and down.

 _And Mumbly just barely finishes ahead of Dee Dee for second place. We've not been given any reports of cheating, but now we see if everyone gets credit for their photos._

Mumbly showed Peter the photo of Pier 62.

"Piers are important for all our ships, so this picture counts," Peter announced.

Similarly, Peter approved Dee Dee's picture showing either side of Holland Tunnel. He looked on curiously, however, at Wally's photo.

"Sir Gator, I asked for a significant picture, not one of your finger."

"Huh, what, what?" Wally asked in confusion.

He looked at the picture. Sure enough, he pressed his finger too close to the lens and obscured the photo. However, he noticed something.

"Excuse me, Mr. Peter. If you look here in the corner, you can clearly see part of the George Washington Bridge," Wally replied. "There was no rule about how much of the landmark was in the photo."

"Let me see that. By golly, you're right. That's the bridge. Your picture counts, too."

"With Wally getting pointers for his picture, let's check the point totals before we go to intermission," Mildew stated.

 _The Yogis get 25 points for first place and stay in the lead with 50 points. The Rottens will hold on the second place; their 15 points gives them 40. Finally, the Scoobies get 10 points for third and 25 overall._

"Now it's time for us to take a quick ferry across the river so we can finish in New Jersey," Mildew told everyone.

"That's right, come join us in New Jersey for new events, and our gold medal winner, even," Snagglepuss replied.

⁂

 _Welcome back to the exciting second half of our Laff-A-Lympics. We've journeyed to Jersey for events including the Beach Biathlon and our terrific tanning contest._

 _We left New York with the Yogis in the lead with 50 points. The Rottens somehow managed to stay close behind with 40. The Scoobies, however, find themselves in the cellar with 25._

 _We're ready for the next events, so we'll return you tour awesome reporting crew of Snagglepuss and Mildew._

"Thanks, I think," Mildew replied. "As you heard, we decided to do our own twist on a Winter Olympic event and have a biathlon on the beach."

"And it's not just any biathlon," Snagglepuss said, "Our brave contestants must run across the beach while avoid all of these sunbathers. Once they do that, they'll be given a chance to shoot targets in our shooting gallery. The team with the best adjusted score will earn the 25 points—and first place, even!"

"I guess that means I'll be introducing our brave contestants yet again. Let's get this over with. We have Cindy Bear racing for the Yogis. Miss Cindy, I know Yogi is good at running away from park rangers, so how come you're running this race?"

"Oh, Mildew, I know how to be dainty and I won't step on any of those sunbathers and make them mad," Cindy replied in her sweet yet southern drawl.

"If you keep answering logically, we're going to have pointy-eared contestants on here. Oh well, let's move on to the Scoobies. Babu will be running this race—and I must say it's a relief to have you in it, big fellow."

"Thanks, Mildew," Babu answered. "Running races is so much fun, as long as nothing bad happens to me."

"He's going to be tough act to follow. Over here, we have everybody's **favorite** magician, The Great Fondoo, running for the Really Rottens. At least your dopey rabbit isn't with you this time."

"Oh, but that's not true, Mildew," Fondoo stated. "He passed his drug test, so you can't call him a dopey rabbit."

"Brack!" the Magic Rabbit interjected from off-screen.

"Well, He's still a rotten rabbit, either way."

"Of course, he is. He's a really rotten rabbit."

"Snag, can we start the race now?"

"OK, everyone. You receive a negative point for every sunbather you step on. You earn a point for each target you successfully shoot. If you shoot all ten targets with no negative points, you get a share of the 25 points," Snagglepuss informed the contestants. "So, let's do an about face and start the race."

Jabberjaw popped out of the Atlantic Ocean to blow the starting whistle.

 _And our racers are off and running the beach portion of the biathlon. Runners receive a one-point deduction for every sunbather to step on or otherwise run into or contact. This score, instead of time, is what matters._

"Pardon, me!" Cindy said, as she stepped on another sunbather. "I didn't expect running in sand to be so tricky. Oh well, I just hope I can make up for it in that shooting thing."

A short distance away, Babu accidentally tripped over a sunbather hidden behind a long umbrella.

"Man, am I clumsy. Maybe I'll make it up to him with a magic umbrella after the race. For now, I better catch up."

"See, Rabbit, I'm doing much better than those goody-two-shoes," Fondoo stated. Unfortunately, he stepped on a kid's foot and knocked over a sandcastle.

"Brack!" the Magic Rabbit exclaimed back.

"Don't take that tone with me, or you won't get any carrot cake tonight!"

 _And now, or runners have dodged the last of the sunbathers. As you see on the screen, the Rottens have the lead with just four deduction points. The Yogis and Scoobies are tied at five, close behind. Whoever proves to be the sharpest shooter will earn the 25 point grand prize._

All three contests ran over to shooter's gallery. Each of them shot ten shots at the ten targets mounted on the carnival-style wheels.

"Alright, let's check the shooting totals and get the final scores, shall we?" Snagglepuss asked.

 _Sure thing, Snagglepuss. Cindy finished with five deductions and shot nine of the ten targets for the Yogis. She finished with a score of plus-four._

"Aww, shucks," Cindy replied. "I didn't know I had it in me. Yogi better be so proud of me."

 _Babu also had five deductions, and he shot all ten of the targets for a score of plus-five._

"Wow, that was great!" Babu exclaimed. "And I didn't need to Yapple Dapple."

In a puff of smoke, Babu's shooting pistol became a plunger.

"Hmm, anyone need a plumber genie? I can grant your wish for cheap prices."

 _And finally, Fondoo only had four deductions in the running portions, but he managed to shoot seven of the targets for a score of plus-three. That means the Scoobies win the Beach Biathlon, followed by the Yogis and the Rottens._

Most of those assembled cheered. Meanwhile, most of the Rottens grumbled.

 _And just to avoid any questions by Mildew or Blue Falcon, nobody cheated._

"Alright then, let's get the updated scores," Mildew said.

 _The Scoobies pick up 25 important points to move up to 50. The Yogis get the 15 second-place points for 65. Finally, the Rottens' 10 points for third place gives them 50._

"We have a close match, everyone. It's going to go down to the wire, even!" Snagglepuss said. "Join us after these messages for our final event."

⁂

"Snag, please tell me you're not serious," Mildew pleased with his commentary partner. "Are we **really** having a suntanning contest? That has to be more boring than watching paint dry on a desert cactus!"

"Don't worry, Mildew. We planned for that and ordered 317x suntan lotion. That will speed up the tanning time and provide the maximum protection. After all, we don't want everyone sizzling like bacon for breakfast."

"At least you think of everything. But how is this going to work?"

"Our three competitors will put on the lotion and tan. Then, our guest judge, Jabberjaw, will make his ruling."

"It sounds simple enough. Maybe that's what scares me."

"Fear not, Mildew. We know what we're doing. Now, let's meet our brave beach folks. For the Yogis, we have the brave Boo Boo Bear."

The Yogis cheered their teammate.

"For the Scoobies, we have Shaggy Rogers."

"This has to be easy. I can eat and tan and not worry about ghosts or monsters," Shaggy replied.

"Let's hope, Shaggy. Let's hope, indeed. Finally, Dirty Dalton will represent the Rottens."

"I have a smaller surface area than anyone else. I should tan faster and better," Dirty said.

"We'll see about that. Anyways, we'll give your tanning lotion so we can get started."

 _As our contestants prepare for this event, the fans anxiously await the final result. There's a good chance the winner will win today's gold medal. In the mean time, let's join Mildew for an on-the-spot interview._

"I'm here with Ranger Smith, the head park ranger at a famous camping resort we can't name on the air," Mildew told the audience. "You actually wanted to talk to us about Boo Boo instead of Yogi?"

"That's right, Mildew," Ranger Smith replied., "This Olympic thing has kept Yogi from pursuing picnic baskets, so I'd prefer to leave him alone and not have him revert to his old bad habits."

"Suit yourself. So, tell us a little about Boo Boo."

"I suppose the big thing he's the opposite of Yogi—considerate, helpful, kind, and trying to keep Yogi out of trouble. Man, if the rest of the bears in our park were like Boo Boo, I'd probably be out of a job."

"We can't have that. But tell me, what do you think of Boo Boo as part of Yogi's Laff-A-Lympics team? More importantly, can bears get a suntan?"

"Anything that keeps them out of trouble and doesn't cause trouble for me is a good thing. I hope he's an asset to his team. As for the latter question, I swear I've heard of sun bears. So, maybe bears can get sun tans after all."

"I suppose your right. All my announcing at these goofy games has shown me the most improbable ideas really are possible. I think we're ready to see who wins our contest, so let's go back to Snagglepuss. And, thanks for the interview."

Jabberjaw blew his whistle to indicate the end of the event.

 _As time runs out for our tanning contest, Snagglepuss will explain how this works._

"As you can see, I have this real nifty infrared meter. I'll be using it to see how much of a tan our contestants got in the allotted time."

 _While Snagglepuss scans Boo Boo, Shaggy, and Dirty, everyone awaits the results. Who will get first place? Will it be enough to win the gold medal?_

"Well, I have the results you've been waiting for. And as I did that, Jabberjaw signaled that nobody cheated."

"It's not like you can cheat in a suntan contest anyways," Mildew interjected.

"Maybe so, but here are the results. Boo Boo only managed a 20% tan for the Yogis."

"Sorry, Yogi," Boo Boo replied. "I did my best."

"That's OK. Sometimes a bear has to just grin and bear it," Yogi answered.

"Shaggy managed a 48% tan."

"Running from monsters in all those tropical places really paid off huh?" Shaggy asked.

Scooby laughed at his teammate's comment.

"And Dirty Dalton for the Rottens managed an 89% tan. The Rottens win in incredible fashion," Snagglepuss announced.

"Are you sure that's right?" Mildew asked. "And they didn't cheat at all?"

"Machines never lie, Mildew. And, Jabberjaw already indicated there were no cheats."

"I guess it's on the up and up then. Can we get the final scores now?"

 _Certainly, Mildew. The Rottens big win nets them 25 important points for a final score of 75. The Scoobies, earning 15 points for second, finish with 65. The Yogis round out the scoring with 10 points and a grand total of 75. This means the Yogis and the Rottens tie for first place!_

"I can't believe it, we share the gold medal today?" Dread Baron asked.

"But we didn't cheat," Mr. Creepley said.

"Oh, Creep, sometimes we need to get points at all costs, even if means we do the wrong thing and play by the rules."

"I think you've gone soft in the head."

Mumbly laughed, only to have his snout poked by Dread Baron.

Elsewhere, Snooper and Orful Octopus shared the top spot on the podium for the Yogis and Rottens respectively—each wearing a gold medal. Captain Caveman accepted the Scoobies' silver medal.

"Well, Snag, we're done for another day," Mildew said.

"Yes, indeed. Indeed, we are," Snagglepuss answered. "But we still have more exciting events and venues, so join us next time."

⁂

 **Mock Social Media Posts**

Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed: The Really Rottens won today's last event to finish in a tie with the Yogi Yahooeys for today's #LaffALympics gold medal. (Yay for 280 characters now!)

Yogi Yahooeys MyBook Account: We finished better than the average team, but Boo Boo's epic tan fail left us in a tie with the Really Rottens.

Rottens Stumbler Account: Flame us if you dare, but we did what was necessary and earned a tie. We're so close to upsetting those goody-goods that we'll do whatever it takes to pass them in the standings... even play fairly. But, we haven't totally abandoned our cheating ways. So don't send us any inquiries about that unless you want to be blocked!

⁂

 **Overall Standings**

Yogi Yahooeys, 230  
Scooby Doobies, 225  
Really Rottens, 210


	4. Pennsylvania & Delaware

_Welcome to our exciting episode of the Laff-A-Lympics. As you can see, an overnight storm blanketed the entire east coast with snow. While this prompted changes in our remaining events, our teams still plan to battle hard as they compete for today's gold medal._

 _We start our day in Pennsylvania before we cross the river and conclude in delightful Delaware. Our reporters are eager to get out of the cold as quickly as possible, so let's go to Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf._

"I tell you what, Snag, just when you think nothing crazier can happen at these contests, something happens," Mildew said. "I can't believe we got all that snow."

"Well, we are paying tribute to the Winter Olympics, so it makes sense," Snagglepuss replied. "And with that in mind, most of today's events will be our own version of your favorites—except maybe shuffleboard."

"At least this mountain that's part of Laurel Hill is good for our first event: cross country skiing."

"The Yogis have chosen to sit out Dixie, Grape Ape, and Blabber Mouse."

"I think they have something against mice today," Blabber told the other two. "Why do **we** have to sit out?"

"Grape Ape?" Grape Ape asked in confusion. He definitely was **not** a mouse.

"Well, let's get started and meet trio of skiers," Snagglepuss said. "For the Yogis, we have a classy canine: Huck Hound."

"I haven't done too well lately, so maybe I can redeem myself here," Huck said.

"If you say so. Moving on to the Scoobies, we have Dynomutt."

"Dogs rule... or do they drool? I can never remember," Dynomutt replied.

"Finally, the Rottens have entered Mrs. Creepley."

"There's nothing like the feel of the wind in my hair, darling," Mrs. Creepley said.

"I'll defer to your better judgment."

"Wow!" Mildew exclaimed. "You know something is amiss when Snag trusts the Rottens' judgment."

"No worries, Mildew. We have a true pioneer helping us as our guest judge today. It's the namesake of this area, William Penn himself, even."

"Thank you kind sir," William replied. "I must say the idea of creatures such as yourself participating in sport seems scandalous, but I'm honored you're using my colony and want me to serve as an impartial arbiter."

"It's a pleasure to have you with us. Go ahead and take your position as we prepare for the start."

 _Our brave contestants will follow this zigzag course down Laurel Hell and the finish line. Our standard scoring system of 25, 15, and 10 points applies. Remember, no cheating._

"Just once I wish people would look at the other teams when he says that," Dread Baron deadpanned.

At the sound of a whistle, the three skiers began their downhill trek.

 _As our contestants reach the first checkpoint, Huck Hound has the early lead. Behind him, Dynomutt and Mrs. Creepley are nose and nose—or would that be nose and snout?_

"It's close, whatever you say, announcer," Dynomutt replied, adding a goofy laugh. "But, I have to get going so I don't disappoint B.F. and the others."

"The way Dynomutt is gaining on me, it's going to be one dogged finish," Huck stated.

"This is why we say to leave puns to the professionals," Mildew said, trailing the skiers on a snow sled that had an on-board camera for closeups.

 _While Mildew ponders his puns, we'll check everyone's progress as they finally reach the second checkpoint. Huck continues to lead, but Dynomutt has closed the gap and he holds a slight advantage over Mrs. Creepley._

Everyone observing cheered loudly for their preferred contestant.

Elsewhere, Dread Baron asked Mr. Creepley, "Is everything all set?"

"Isn't it always, Dread," Mr. Creepley replied. "This secret sensor is buried in the snow, so nobody will see it. Once my wife crosses over it, it will release the super secret ski wax and help her speed up all the way into first place."

"It's one of our sneakier tricks, isn't it?"

"Let's hide, here they come!"

As Dread Baron and Mr. Creepley hid behind a tree, they watched as the skiers continues to stay close to one another.

Dynomutt briefly lost his balance and veered to side when he suddenly started to speed up.

"Hmm, I don't remember activating my dyno-skis. B.F. certainly didn't tell me to do that," he remarked out loud.

"Oh no!" Mr. Creepley groaned. "That dumb dog stole my wife's ski wax. Now, we won't win."

"Drat!" Dread Baron exclaimed.

 _As we wait to see who finished first, we have Dynomutt winning by a long shot?! How did he manage to ski so fast. Huck Hound finished second for the Yogis just ahead of Mrs. Creepley._

"Something's not right here," Mildew stated.

"I agree!" Blue Falcon interjected. "Normally, I'd be happy that Dynomutt won an event, but I've never seen him ski that fast before."

"Well, why don't we take a look and see what happened. William, what do you have for us?"

"As you see here, thanks to those fancy gadgets you told me about, the team with the R's on their shirts tried to wax their teammate's skis in-race. Instead, the mechanical dog ended up on the receiving end of this hidden trick."

As the Rottens howled and catcalled upon discovery of their cheat, Blue Falcon looked on in shock.

 _Unfortunately, we have a difficult decision to declare. The Rottens are disqualified for their attempted cheat. To add insult to injury, this means Dynomutt is disqualified, too, because he directly benefited form the cheat—even if he remained unaware._

The rest of the Scoobies sighed in frustration.

"How was I supposed to know I was cheating?" Dynomutt asked.

"You couldn't help it, but don't you feel better knowing you didn't win under false pretenses?" Blue Falcon asked his sidekick.

"Now that you mention, I do feel better. Next time, lend me your Falcon Cheat Detector when I race."

 _With that out of the way, the Yogis will receive the 25 points for first place because they were the only team in the race that finished without cheating. The Rottens and Scoobies get no points for their disqualifications._

⁂

"We're here in Pittsburgh at Point State Park for our next event," Mildew informed the audience.

"Yes, indeed. Indeed, we are," Snagglepuss replied. "We're using this makeshift outdoor rink for our two-on-two hockey tournament."

"But that's not all. Each team will be on the ice and have a chance to score up to three goals."

 _That's right, Mildew. The first goal is worth the usual 25 points, with the others worth 15 and 10 respectively. This means a single team could sweep all 50 points._

"Let's meet our brave hockey hopefuls, shall we?" Snagglepuss said.

"Somehow, I always get stuck with the player introductions," Mildew lamented. "Oh well, let's get this over with. For the Yogis, we have that fabulous father-son duo: Augie Doggie and Doggie Daddy."

"The family that plays hockey together stays together, Mildew," Doggie Daddy said.

"You tell 'em, dear old dad!" Augie added.

"Anyways," Mildew continued, "Captain Caveman and Brenda will brave the ice for the Scoobies."

"Cavey, here, lived in the Ice Age. So, he should be a natural in ice hockey," Brenda explained.

"I'm not sure what to think about that logic. Finally, we have Daisy Mayhem and the Great Fondoo for the Rottens? Boy, I wish I took that early retirement package right about now."

"That wouldn't be wise for you, Mildew," Fondoo replied. "You'd miss our chance to be nice on the ice."

"Fondoo, don't ever use 'nice' to describe our team!" Daisy scolded.

"I need a bubble bath about now," Mildew discreetly stated.

 _As our teams take the ice, and William Penn sits in the observation booth, we prepare for the start of our event. And, there's the puck. Daisy, Augie, and Brenda jab and swing furiously in an attempt to control the puck and a chance at the 25-point goal._

Daisy broke free with the puck and took a slap-shot towards the net. Captain Caveman swung his club and deflected the puck away.

"Cavey, don't you have a hockey stick? I could use your help," Brenda said.

Captain Caveman grunted and reached into his fur. He pulled out a waffle iron, a rake, and a unicycle before growling in frustration. Finally, he pulled out a hockey stick.

"Here, funny stick with hook," he mumbled before rejoining the playing action.

 _Augie has the puck, but it's poked away by Fondoo. Fondoo looks to take the shot, but it's blocked by Captain Caveman! Brenda picks up the loose puck and shoots it past a diving Doggie Daddy for the first goal!_

"See, Cavey. I told you that a hockey stick would help," she said.

"Me natural," Captain Caveman replied.

 _Can the Scoobies get another goal? This one is worth 15 points. Brenda takes the puck, but it's stolen by Fondoo. He looks to pass to Daisy, but Augie intercepts the pass and shoots._

Daisy tried to block the shot, but she kicked her foot and fell to the ice in pain.

"Ow! Ow! That was a bad idea, trying to kick a puck with bare feet," she said.

 _The puck goes into the net for an apparent goal by the Rottens._

"Hold on!" Snagglepuss yelled. "We have to review that. You can't kick a puck into the net."

"I agree," Blue Falcon added. "Sportsmanship must be preserved at all costs."

 _As we review the rules, the Rottens will_ _ **not**_ _credit for the goal as Daisy's kick directed the puck into the net. Augie will receive credit for the goal, giving 15 points to the Yogis._

"Good job, son," Doggie Daddy said as the rest of his teammates cheered.

"Thanks, dead old dad," Augie replied.

 _We have one last goal to score. Augie takes the puck and looks to score again, but Captain Caveman blocks the shot and takes one of his own._

"Observe, the Great Fondoo, will score a goal for you—without my magic."

Fondoo narrowly stopped Captain Caveman's shot from score and skated skillfully down the ice and scored a legitimate goal for the Rottens.

"Hey, Fondoo. Good job for scoring but can you do something for my sore foot here. Hobbling on ice isn't a good idea. I don't need one of those scary concussion thingies I keep hearing about," Daisy said.

Fondoo pulled out his wand and chanted, "Abacradabra, abracadoo. Please heal Daisy's sports boo-boo."

After a large puff of smoke, the audience involuntarily booed twice at the Rottens.

"Fondoo, just get me a bandage or something and stop using your awful magic!" Daisy screamed.

"Oh, but it's getting better," Fondoo replied. "Last time I tried that spell, I was in the hospital for a week."

"Before things can get any worse, please update the scores for us," Mildew pleaded.

 _The Scoobies get 25 points for the first goal and have 25 at the intermission. The Yogis earned 15 points for their awarded goal. They stay in the lead with 40 points. Finally, the Rottens get 10 points for a total of 10 as we enter intermission—and Daisy enters the infirmary._

"Well, Mildew, we made it through that mostly intact. Let's take a quick break, refresh ourselves, and get ready for the last events," Snagglepuss said.

"What's your secret, Snag?" Mildew asked. "How can you stay so calm?"

"We only have four events to worry about. Every time one ends, we're that closer to being done for the day."

"I suppose I can try to think about it that way."

 _As we prepare to part ways with Pennsylvania and cross the Delaware into Delaware, we invite you to stay tuned for the second half of our all-star Laff-A-Lympics competition._

⁂

 _Welcome to the second half of today's Laff-A-Lympics. Watch our teams duel decisively in Delaware with short track speed skating and snowman building._

 _When we left Pennsylvania, The Yogis led with 40 points. The Scoobies are close behind with 15, and the Rottens are in their usual spot with 10 points._

 _Let's rejoin Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf for the next event._

"We're here at the junction between the Christina and Delaware rivers for our next event," Mildew announced, "But don't let it fool you. Short track speeding skating is a race that covers three kilometers—or just over 1.8 miles for those of you metrically challenged—so whomever races will need stamina... and I need to catch my breath from saying that."

"While you take a breather, I'll introduce our contestants... our skaters even," Snagglepuss replied. "For the Yogis, we have Wally Gator."

"I'm a water creature, but I can hope I do nice on ice," Wally stated.

"For the Scoobies, we have Blue Falcon."

"Win or lose, I want to represent our team with sportsmanship and class—so people know those traits aren't a lost art," Blue Falcon said.

"How chivalrous. Finally, we have Orful Octopus for the Really Rottens. But because each person is limited to two skates, he can only lace up two tentacles."

Orful gurgled at Snagglepuss before Mr. Creepley translated, "Orful says, even with this silly rule, he plans to skate his way to victory."

"Everyone has taken their starting positions. The one who finishes three k first without cheating wins 25 points."

At the sound of a simulated shot everyone started to skate. Wally did his best to skate quickly without losing his balance. Blue Falcon took the early lead as Orful tried to adjust to skating on just two of his eight tentacles.

 _As our skaters reach the one kilometer split, Wally has a decisive lead and Orful narrowly leads over Blue Falcon for second place._

"I don't know how he's doing it, but he's not cheating," Blue Falcon stated.

Orful gurgled as he continued to skate in an attempt to catch Wally.

 _As we reach the two kilometer split, Blue Falcon has taken the lead as Wally has second place now with Orful trying to get out of the cellar. Can Blue Falcon strike a victory for sportsmanship?_

"Only one way to find out," he answered. "Blue Falcon away!"

 _As we reach the home stretch Wally and Orful continue to show signs of fatigue. It will be Blue Falcon with the win. And now, here comes Wally with a big lead over Orful; Wally will take second place._

Orful dropped to ice, panting as all eight of his tentacles spread out.

Blue Falcon checked his watch and pressed a button.

"Excellent. My Falcon anti-cheat detector has discovered no ghastly gamesmanship," he announced. He shook Wally's hand and walked over to Orful.

"Orful, I know you're probably too tired from skating three kilometers. But you really challenged me early in the race. Thanks."

Orful gave a soft gurgle as Mr. Creepley came over with an oxygen mask.

 _With our short track speed skating now complete, let's update the scoreboard. The Scoobies get 25 points to move up to 40. The Yogis get 15 points to keep the lead with 55. The Rottens, with their 10 points, remain in last place with 20. With one more event to go, anything can happen._

⁂

"We're here in Wilmington Banning Regional Park for our final event: a good, old-fashioned snowman building contest," Mildew announced. "Oddly enough, I'm looking forward to this event."

"You're not the only one," Snagglepuss replied. "Our teams will also be interested to know that we're tripling the points."

All the eligible participants cheered loudly.

"The best part is everyone will be allowed to take part in this event. And, judging the event will be our very own guest from Bedrock: Barney Rubble."

"Thanks, Snagglepuss," Barney said. "I want to keep things simple, so I'll pick the winner based originality, creativity, and sportsmanship."

"And remember, we're tripling the points and the penalties."

"There goes our game plan," Mr. Creepley stated.

 _As our teams start their snowmen, we invite you to watch our next exciting episode of Laff-A-Lympics. Check your local listings for dates, times, and availability of streaming video._

"Hey, hey, hey, what do we have here?" Yogi asked, spotting a picnic basket alongside the Yogis' snowman.

"Hey, there's nothing in there for..." Boo Boo replied before Yogi opened the basket and pulled out a snowball.

"This looks like something to me."

"It was a theme Yogi. Since snowmen might get hungry, it's possible they'd eat snow cones."

"Scoob, are you sure this is a good idea? This is a snow **man** building contest, not a snow dog contest," Shaggy said.

"C'mon, Shaggy," Babu protested. "You heard our judge, he wants originality. What's more original than a snowman that looks like a dog?."

"You do have a point. But isn't the jewelry a little too much?"

"It's never too much!"

Elsewhere, the Rottens worked on their snowman. For some reason, they erected a solid protective barrier around their work.

"I hope this works, Creepley," Dread Baron said.

"It should, Dread. They want creativity, so let's give it to them. I bet neither team would have come up with this idea," Mr. Creepley replied.

"You better hope it works. If we're not going to cheat, we need to win and get those triple points."

 _With time expiring, Barney is ready to review the teams' masterpieces and select a winner. Who might that be? And, why are the Rottens being so secretive?_

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Dread Baron asked.

Mumbly snickered until one of his teammates flicked his nose.

"Well, Barney, tell us your thoughts on each snowman," Mildew said.

"The Yogis did an interesting job with a summer-themed snowman. The picnic basket was a nice touch. They certainly showed creativity."

Yogi and his teammates smiled at the compliments.

"And over here, the Scoobies were very original with their dog-shaped snowman. The Middle Eastern jewelry is unexpected, and I'm not sure if I like it, or if it's just a bit over the top."

"Oh, shucks. I hope I didn't cost us a win, guys," Babu said.

"Don't worry," Blue Falcon replied. "It was fun to do this, and you were only trying to help us win. Think positive."

"You're right. Let's see what happens."

Barney walked over to the Rottens who removed their protective barrier, revealing an octopus-shaped snowman.

"This was to honor Orful since he had to sit out this event after his unfortunate experiences skating," Mrs. Creepley explained.

"Orful, if you see this on the webcast, we miss you," Junior Creepley added.

Barney looked at the snow octopus and said, "It's certainly original; I've never seen one before, but something seems to be missing here for some reason."

 _Barney will review his notes and announce a winner momentarily. Meanwhile, our teams wait in eager anticipation as the winner will likely receive today's gold medal_.

Barney rejoined Snagglepuss and Mildew.

"Guys," he said, "It was hard to pick a winner and I reviewed my notes several times. Finally, I told myself, 'Barney, you need to pick a winner.' So, I've decided the Scoobies' snow dog wins first place with the Yogi's summer snowman a close second."

As the Rottens howled in disgust while the others cheered, the scoreboard displayed on-screen.

 _With the last results in, let's get the final scores. The Scoobies earn an impressive 75 points to finish with 115. The Yogis, who earn 45 points for second place, finish with 100. The Rottens, who receive 30 points for their effort, finish with 50. This means the Scooby Doobies win today's Laff-A-Lympics gold medal!_

On the podium, Shaggy wore the gold medal for the winners. Cindy Bear accepted the Yogis' silver medal and Daisy Mayhem showed off her team's bronze medal.

"Well, Snag, that went off without and hitches or cheating. You could say there were no snags... except for you," Mildew said.

"Chuckle, chuckle," Snagglepuss replied. "You're right, we had a fun day. Maybe we'll have one next time, even."

"We can only hope. I just hope those savage Rottens don't cause any more trouble."

"Maybe so, but then they wouldn't be Rottens, would they?"

"You have a point. What a conundrum."

 _As Mildew ponders the value of reformed Rottens, we thank you for joining us for today's competition. Tune in next time for more exciting Laff-A-Lympics as we explore more venues and events in Colonial America._

⁂

 **Mock Social Media Posts**

Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed: Thanks to a big win in our snowman building contest, the Scooby Doobies won today's #LaffALympics gold medal. View their unique creation at smalllink·invalid/p156

Scooby Doobies FacePlace Account: Who would think we'd win a gold medal for snowman... err, snow dog... building? Well, we did, and we want to keep the lead until the playoffs.

Rottens Stumbler Account: Hey, we got disqualified. How's that for returning to our Rotten Roots? Should we try for second place in these last few events? Reblog with your thoughts or send us an inquiry.

⁂

 **Overall Standings**

Scooby Doobies, 340  
Yogi Yahooeys, 330  
Really Rottens, 260


	5. Maryland & Virginia

_Welcome to another thrilling episode of Laff-A-Lympics. We'll begin our exciting events in marvelous Maryland and cap them off in Virginia._

 _With the continued winter weather, everyone is eager to get started and stay warm, so let's go ahead and turn things over to our reporters on the spot: Mildew Wolf and Snagglepuss._

"Snag, can I please announce our first event? You can understand why I want to do this," Mildew said.

"Of course, you can," he replied. "I won't stop you, even!"

"Well, everyone, we're here at the Savage River State Forest for our first event. How appropriate, huh? Somehow, we have a twisted luge course here to challenge our twisted savages."

"This is one place where being on the ice could be nice."

"And remember, leave the puns to professionals, boys and girls. Let's go ahead and see who's brave enough to slide on a sled at breakneck speeds."

"Don't forget to tell everyone who's sitting out for the Yogis," Snagglepuss reminded Mildew.

"Thanks. I'm still not used to that rule. Anyways, Boo Boo, Hokey, and Doggie Daddy will be sitting out for the Yogis today. So, Mr. Jinks will be the one on the Luge for the Yogis."

"Is it too late to find someone else?" Mr. Jinks asked nervously. "Nobody else wanted to do it, so I was chosen."

"Surely, you're not a 'fraidy cat. Over here, it looks like Scooby Dum will be racing for the Scoobies."

Scooby Dum replied with his usual comment of, "Dum dum dum dum!"

"He must be to be participating in such a dangerous event. It looks like team captain Mumbly is going to race for the Rottens."

Mumbly pointed and snickered.

"I guess I missed the joke. Alright, let's learn more about our opening event."

 _As you can see, our course follows the twists and turns of the mountains to make it especially challenging. You'll really earn points today, folks, whether is 25, 15, or 10. Remember not to cheat._

Mumbly snickered again.

 _Our order of participants will be the Rottens, followed by the Scoobies, and then the Yogis._

At the signal, Mumbly pushed his luge down the start of the course and got on. He did his best to hold on as he navigated all the twists and turns in speeds close to 140 km/h [87.0 mph].

 _As Mumbly crosses the finish line, his time is one minute and 9.20 seconds. Given the course distance of 5610 feet [1710 m]—or 1 1/16 miles—this is an average speed of 55.27 miles per hour [88.96 km/h]._

The Rottens looked on curiously. They didn't grumble, but they wondered how their time would fare with the other two teams going next.

Scooby Dum waited for the starting signal. Despite a near mishap as he mounted the luge and a couple of close calls on the sharpest turns, he somehow completed the course successfully.

 _Scooby Dum has somehow completed his run in one minute and 3.97 seconds—5.23 seconds better than the Rottens! His average speed was 59.79 miles per hour [96.23 km/h]._

"I didn't know I had it in me," Scooby Dum stated before collapsing in a heap.

 _As Scooby Dum remains shocked by his performance, we now see what Mr. Jinks can do. Can he beat the Scoobies' mark?_

"The meeses aren't here, but one bad turn and I may cut myself up into pieces," Mr. Jinks replied. Here goes nothing. Tally ho!"

Mr. Jinks yelled a few times as his luge took a few turns faster than he preferred, but he somehow managed to stay on his luge and cleanly finished the race. His final time would determine the final placings.

 _Mr. Jinx crossed the finish line in one minute and 2.34 seconds. That beats the Scoobies by 1.63 seconds!_

The Yogis cheered the announcement. The Scoobies, disappointed that they didn't win, still applauded their silver medal finish.

 _For those keeping track at home, Mr. Jinks' finished with an average speed of 61.36 miles per hour [98.74 km/h]._

"That sure was exciting, Snag. All three teams finished within seven seconds of each other," Mildew said.

"Yes, indeed. Indeed, it was," Snagglepuss replied. "And let's get the early scores."

 _The Yogis take the early lead with 25 points. The Scoobies are close behind with 15 and the Rottens get 10 points for their third place effort._

"Razzin frazzin, luge losing brazzin," Mumbly muttered.

⁂

"We're here at the frozen Potomac River for our next event: ice shuffleboard," Snagglepuss announced.

"Snag, I hate to sound like a Gloomy Gus, but didn't we do curling before? Why not do that again instead of shuffleboard on ice?" Mildew asked.

"You're right. Don't be a Moldy Mildew, Mildew. We thought shuffleboard on ice might be more of a challenge. We can't have everyone earning easy points from easy events, even."

"I guess I can't argue with that."

"With that out of the way, let's meet our contestants. For the Yogis, we have Snooper and Blabber."

"We're going to do well together, right Schnoop?" Blabber Mouse commented.

"Less blabbing and more shuffling, Blab," Snooper replied.

"As the Yogis discuss strategy, we have Speed Buggy and Tinker for the Scoobies. Can a buggy really play shuffleboard?" Snagglepuss asked in disbelief.

"Golly! Of course, he can," Tinker answered. "He can use tires with no traction to push the disks down the ice."

"A good point. For the Rottens, we have that improbable country duo of Daisy Mayhem and Sooey Pig."

Sooey oinked a bit.

"Of course, you can do shuffleboard, Sooey," Daisy replied. "Just don't slip and slide on the ice when it's our turn."

 _Teams will alternate shooting their disks with each player shooting two of the team's four. The team with the best total earns 25 points._

As the game started all players did their best to score as many points as possible. A few disks failed to score while others got knocked out of favorable positions by an opponent.

 _With the last disk now played, let's review the final scores._

"The Yogis have one disk out of play, two good for eight points each, and one in the ten-off space," Snagglepuss informed everyone. "They have a total of six points."

The Yogis briefly cheered, eager to see how the other teams fared.

"The Scoobies had two disks not score, one worth the full ten points, but the last one is in ten-off. So, their score is zero."

Scooby frowned in disappointment. Zero didn't sound like a good score for the effort his teammates put into the game.

"Here, the Rottens somehow spread out their disks. One each in seven, eight, and ten—and one in ten-off. They finish with 15 points and the win. And to make sure everything is on the up and up, we had a guest judge secretly observe. Here is George Calvert, the first Lord Baltimore."

"Thank you, kind creature. I observed nothing out of the ordinary. I hope this suffices," Lord Baltimore told everyone.

"It does, indeed. Thanks for your help."

Dread Baron jumped up and down, yelling, "How could you win without cheating?!"

"Maybe this is a sign of a new, improved Rottens," Mildew quipped.

"New, improved Rottens would cheat in ways you could never imagine," Dread retorted.

"Can we get the first half scores now?"

 _Sure, Mildew. The Rottens earn 25 points fair and square, much to Dread Baron's chagrin, to move up to 35. The Yogis get 15 points to keep the lead with 40. The Scoobies, who earn ten points, finish with 25. We'll see if they can move out of the cellar in the second half of our show._

"Don't go away. Stay right there, even," Snagglepuss told the audience. "You definitely won't want to miss today's finish."

⁂

 _Welcome back to the second half of our awesome All-Star Laff-A-Lympics. In Virginia, watch as we attempt to slalom our way through the Blue Ridge Mountains and see who can win a shipbuilding contest._

 _When we left Maryland, the Yogis led with 40 points. The Rottens were amazingly close behind with 35. And, the Scoobies found themselves trailing with 25. We'll turn things over to Snagglepuss and Mildew as we eagerly await today's gold medal winners._

"Thanks," Snagglepuss replied. "We're here in the Blue Ridge Mountains for our silly slalom race."

"Isn't any race these savages do silly?" Mildew asked.

"It's not that, Mildew. Each team's skier will have to do something silly when crossing the finish line, or else their race won't count."

"We may never know the difference."

"Maybe not, but to spice things up, the winning team gets free salami and cheese sandwiches for all its members."

All three teams' individuals applauded and cheered loudly.

"For the Yogis, we have team captain Yogi himself."

"I ski better than the average bear, and I'll slalom my way to that salami."

"For the Scoobies, Scooby Doo will ski."

Scooby licked his chops at the prospect of free food.

"And for the Rottens, we have Dinky Dalton."

"Where's that course and those sandwiches?" he asked as his ski mask and hat covered his eyes.

 _As you can see, our course twists and turns. Be sure to cross through all the gates and do something silly at the finish line. With the Scoobies trailing in the standings, they will go first._

Scooby did his best to successfully navigate the turns and pass through all the gates. As he reached the finish line, he skied on one foot, leaned forward, and stuck his tongue out. Unfortunately, he also fell flat on his face after crossing the finish line.

"Don't worry, Scooby," Mildew said. "Style doesn't count—only your finishing time."

 _Mildew is right. Scooby finished the course with a time of 2 minutes and 2.43 seconds. Next, we have Dinky Dalton for the Rottens._

"Someone give me a push... or point me in the right direction," Dinky said.

Dinky, despite not seeing what he was doing, somehow managed to clear all the gates.

"Do something silly now, Dink!" Dirty Dalton called out.

Dinky removed his helmet and balanced it on one of his skis as he crossed the finish.

"Look at me, I'm king of the ski!" he shouted.

 _The judges have ruled Dinky's actions to be silly, so his time of 2 minutes and 6.19 seconds stands. Can Yogi finish ahead of him, or Scooby? Let's find out._

"I'm going to ski faster than the average..." Yogi began before the gate opened to send him onto the course.

"... Bear!" Yogi called out before narrowly clearing the first gate. He found himself veering perilously close to most of the gates before he better controlled himself for the last portion of the course.

"Don't forget to do something silly, Yogi," Boo Boo called out to his team captain."

"No worries, Boo Boo. I'm so good with food, I'll do what I should," Yogi replied, opening a picnic basket and tossing the food up into the air. As Yogi crossed the finish line, he caught each item in the basket before closing the lid.

 _Our judges find throwing food to be risky, but silly enough to pass in this case. Yogi's final time is 2 minutes and 2.84 seconds. That means the Scoobies win by just forty-one hundredths of a second!_

As the Scoobies cheered, Shaggy said, "OK, now give us those sandwiches!"

"Yeah!" Scooby interjected.

"In a moment. We have to take care of other things first—and update the scores, even!" Snagglepuss said.

 _The Scoobies get 25 important points, the salami sandwiches, and move up to 50 points. The Yogis earn 15 points to keep the lead with 55. Once again, the Rottens get 10 points to fall into last place with 45 points._

Elsewhere, the Rottens huddled up to discuss strategy.

"Alright you rotten Rottens," Dread Baron said, "I know we have a chance to win if we play fair, but we need to cheat more than we have been. What do you guys say."

"We need to cheat, otherwise we can't be Rottens. I'm not changing our name to the Good Sports," Dinky Dalton replied.

"We can always use my magic to help us win," Fondoo said.

"Your magic is guaranteed to make us lose. But, we can't afford to finish in last place all the time, either," Daisy said.

"She's right," Mr. Creepley replied. "Sure, we should cheat, but we should try to outscore at least one of those goody-good teams to show them cheating does pay off."

Mumbly snickered until someone poked him in the nose.

"Alright, I'll decide what to do before our next event," Dread announced.

⁂

"Alright, Mildew, I think our last event will be a bit relaxing for you," Snagglepuss said as the action switched to the next venue.

"I sure hope so, but I don't understand why we're in this room for a shipbuilding contest," Mildew replied. "Shouldn't we be outside for that?"

"I can explain that. Professor S. H. Ipbuilder here from the shipbuilding school. Your competitors aren't trained in shipbuilding, so we decided to give them something more in line with their abilities. We're going to have them build model ships and see if they float in this water chamber."

"That makes sense, surprisingly. I think it's the first time **anything** made sense on this show."

 _As stated, any or all of a team's available members can participate. The professor will judge our winners based on craftsmanship, design, and whether the finished product floats._

Elsewhere, Dread Baron signaled to his teammates, who all nodded in acknowledgment.

"Alright, everyone. Get to building," Snagglepuss said.

Although teams had an hour to complete their model ships, the coverage skipped most of the time and focused on key moments partway through the event. Each team worked intently, eager to win the final event and hopefully earn another gold medal."

As a foghorn sounded to indicate time expired, each team brought their model ship over to the water chamber.

"Hmm," Professor Ipbuilder said, "The Yogis decided to a variation of the birch bark canoe with a reinforced bottom. I like the traditional design and the innovative idea. Let's see if it floats."

As Yogi put the model canoe into the chamber, the canoe sprung a leak on the side and sank to the bottom.

"I guess your reinforcement weakened the sides. Such a shame," the professor told Yogi.

"I guess our ship wasn't so shipshape," Yogi quipped.

Next, Scooby Dum presented his team's ship for inspection.

"This pontoon boat had to be a challenge to assemble properly. I'll remember your excellent engineering skills. But will it float?" Professor Ipbuilder asked.

Much to his surprise, the ship floated perfectly, earning cheers from the Scoobies.

The Rottens presented their boat to the professor for the final inspection.

"No wonder you took almost the whole hour. This battleship is so detailed it took probably half the time or more to put together. This is impressive intricacy."

The Rottens cheered as their battleship managed to stay afloat.

 _Have the Rottens managed to sink their competition? As the professor finalizes his notes and prepares for his announcement..._

"Hold it one second!" Mildew shouted. "I just learned the Rottens used industrial strength glue instead of the regular model glue everyone else had."

Everyone looked on intently. The Rottens, however, cheered. Did they really want to be caught?

"Actually," Professor Ipbuilder, replied, "There was no reason the other teams couldn't use it as it was available for all to use. So, it's not a cheat."

"Drat!" Dread Baron exclaimed. "We cheated, got caught, and **now** they tell us it's not cheating. How rotten is that?"

"Very," Mr. Creepley said. "That's why we're the Really Rottens."

"That's a good point. It's only fair we have rotten luck; we certainly can't have **good** luck."

"It was too close to decide, but since I did say I'd judge based on craftsmanship, I'm giving first place to the Rottens—just barely, though."

"Wow, we tried to cheat and end up winning instead. We really do have rotten luck!"

 _Let's review the final scores. The Rottens earn 25 points for a final score of 70. The Scoobies, with 15 points for second, end up with 65. The Yogis get 10 points for their effort, but finish out of first place with 65 points. This gives the Rottens an outright win for today's gold medal!_

I don't know if I should be happy or cry! Dread Baron replied.

As Mumbly snickered, Mrs. Creeply said, "Why not both?"

"You're right, I'm happy we beat those goody goods, but being told our cheating was fine makes me want to cry!"

As someone handed Dread Baron a handkerchief, Orful Octopus accepted the team's gold medal. Hong Kong Phooey and Hokey Wolf shared the second spot on the podium with each wearing a silver medal for their finish as tied runners-up.

"Snag, things turned out pretty good," Mildew told his colleague.

"Indeed, they did. They did, indeed," Snagglepuss replied. "We have one more set of events before the playoffs, so we can guarantee things should stay exciting."

"And we may have to spoil things again if we're too far behind. Besides, we're gonna save ourselves for the playoffs," Mr. Creepley told the audience.

 _As another crazy competition ends, we ask you to tune in next time to see which team finishes as the top seed. We'll then wrap things up with the playoffs and a special post-season banquet you won't want to miss. Join us for the remaining episodes of our All-Star Laff-A-Lympics._

⁂

 **Mock Social Media Posts**

Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed: Rottens cheat backfires, leads to a win of today's #Laff-A-Lympics Gold Medal.

Yogi Yahooeys MyBook Account: We may not be good shipbuilders, but we're still sailing our way to the top spot. Can we overtake our rival Scoobies?

Rottens Stumbler Account: We cheated, and we still won. No matter, beating those goody goods leaves them feeling Rotten, I bet. Reblog us and also like our post if you want us to cheat more next time!

⁂

 **Overall Standings**

Scooby Doobies, 405  
Yogi Yahooeys, 395  
Really Rottens, 330


	6. North Carolina & South Carolina

_Greetings, one and all. Welcome to another exciting episode of the Laff-A-Lympics. Our all-Carolina competition begins in North Carolina before we wrap up the regular season in South Carolina._

 _Because this is our last competition before the playoffs, you can be sure our teams will want to pick up as many points as possible for a favorable seeding. So, one can expect the Yogi Yahooeys, the Scooby Doobies, and even the Really Rottens to give it their all—and then some—today._

 _With the first event starting soon, let's go to Snagglepuss and Mildew. Take it away, gentlemen._

"Welcome, one and all. Welcome to our Laff-A-Lympics," Snagglepuss told the audience. "We're here in the Great Smokey Mountains for our opening events."

"That's right, Snag," Mildew replied. "Although this cold is making my whiskers break off, our opening event of a snowboard race sounds like it could be entertaining. Oh, and before I forget, the Yogis will have Quick Draw, Snooper, and Wally sit out today."

"And with that out of the way, let's meet our spectacular snowboarders. For the Yogis, we have our favorite hot dog, Huckleberry Hound."

"Thanks, Snagglepuss, but I'm trying to keep it cool today so nothing melts," Huck replied.

"Indeed. Next, we have Hong Kong Phooey."

"I'll chop my competition down to size!" Hong Kong stated.

"Hopefully, he remembers he's not a lumberjack. Finally, we have the Great Fondoo for the Rottens."

"And don't forget my rabbit," Fondoo told Snagglepuss as the Magic Rabbit popped out of Fondoo's hat and waved.

 _As you can see, we have a downhill course with a couple of jumps and twists to keep you on your toes. The team that can successfully navigate the course first without cheating earns 25 points with our usual 15 and 10 for second and third place._

As Mildew reappeared on-screen, he said, "And let's not forget our guest judge for the first two events today: Sir Walter Raleigh."

"Thank you, kind creature," he replied. "I have to admit I'd be afraid of being burned at the stake if I told people what I was doing today. Thankfully, I had advance notice that there was nothing to worry about. I look forward to being part of these curious festivities."

"I'm not sure if that sound was your stomach or the starting signal, but let's get ready for our race."

 _Well, Mildew, that was in fact our starting signal. Our racers have left the gate and they're jockeying for early position. Even though it's too close to call for now, the first jump will undoubtedly change that very fast._

As the trio performed their first jump, Fondoo crouched down in hopes of going farther than either Huck or Hong Kong.

 _After the first jump, Fondoo's strategy has paid off with the early lead. Hong Kong Phooey has a slight lead ahead of Huck for second place._

Both fans and the remaining team members cheered the preliminary results. Back on the course, Hong Kong did his best to catch up to Fondoo.

Fondoo shrugged as Hong Kong crouched down and make fake karate chops.

"And people say I look like a fool when I practice my magic," Fondoo deadpanned.

"Practice definitely hasn't made perfect," Daisy Mayhem told the audience.

"Brack!" The Magic Rabbit exclaimed before pointing.

"Who asked you?" Fondoo retorted.

"Brack!"

"Uh oh!"

 _As we reach the first turn, Fondoo and his rabbit have been caught off guard. This allows Hong Kong Phooey to take the lead!_

"Who said I can't snowboard?" Hong Kong asked.

Upon hitting a tree stump and crashing, he replied, "I guess I spoke too soon."

 _As Hong Kong finds himself stumped by hidden obstacles, Huck Hound takes the lead for the Yogis. We have one last turn before the final jump and the finish line, so anything can happen... and it usually does._

Despite his best efforts, Fondoo's perfect turn wasn't enough to overtake Huck for the lead. A short time later, Hong Kong navigated the turn.

"I need to make like suey and chop!" he said.

 _As we make our way to the final jump, Huck maintains the lead with Fondoo behind him and Hong Kong in third._

"Observe, I shall use my magic to help me take first place in the race," Fondoo stated. "Abracadabra, abra-cazace, help me roll into first place."

Despite a large puff of smoke, nothing appeared to happen.

 _Sorry, Fondoo, nothing happened. I guess your magic doesn't work in winter weather._

"Something always happens. That's what scares me."

Upon hearing a rumbling sound, the Magic Rabbit pointed frantically.

"Uh oh, let's get out of here..."

Before Fondoo could finish his sentence, an avalanche engulfed Fondoo. Moments later, the rest of the snowboarders found themselves swallowed by the snow.

 _As the snow covers our competitors and crosses the finish line, we have no way of knowing who won the event. Did the Yogis yank away a victory? Did the Scoobies sneak away with the 25 points. Or, did the Really Rottens really win this race?_

"Thankfully, we're prepared for something like this," Snagglepuss announced. "We expected something like this to happen, so we used our overhead drone with x-ray technology. We can use it and our replay to determine who crossed first."

"It makes me wonder what they'll come up with next. Perhaps an instant cheat detector?" Mildew mused.

 _As Mildew ponders technological thoughts, let's review the race footage. Based on the overhead drone's X-rays, we see the skeleton of Huck Hound crossing the finish line first, even if he didn't realize it. For once, Hong Kong's karate chops made the different as he finishes a wrist bone ahead of Fondoo. And, we can even see the rabbit hiding in what would be Fondoo's hat._

"But, what about cheating, Snag? Fondoo's dopey magic really messed things up again," Mildew reminded his colleague.

"The judges ruled that Fondoo finishing last on account of his magic is more than enough punishment," Snagglepuss answered.

"And I saw nothing out of the ordinary, and that includes that avalanche," Sir Walter Raleigh added.

 _With that out of the way, the Yogis start with 25 points right off the bat. The Scoobies will pick up 15 points for second while the Rottens finish third, earning 10 points._

"Razzing-frazzing-bad magic-blazzin..." Mumbly grumbled.

⁂

As the camera turned to Mildew, he said, "As you can see, we're ready for our next event. We plan to have a super snowmobile race to see who wins the next 25 points."

"And not only that," Snagglepuss replied, "We're conducting this race on a stretch of US-25 that goes between the two states. Our starting line is in North Carolina and the finish line is on the other side of the South Carolina border."

"Now, let's see who our daring drivers are for this race. Judging from this oversize snowmobile, I have to assume Grape Ape is racing for the Yogis. What do you think, big fellow, can you win this race?"

"Grape Ape!" Grape Ape replied confidently.

"If you insist. Over here, the Scoobies have opted to retrofit Speed Buggy as a snowmobile piloted by Tinker. Do you want to say anything before the race?"

"Well, golly, Mildew," Tinker replied, "I've raced before, but I'm a little worried about hitting a patch of ice when we least expect it."

"Don't... scare me... like that," Speed Buggy sputtered.

"I'm sure he meant no harm," Mildew stated. "And for the Rottens, we have Dread Baron."

"Of course, it's me, Millstone. Racing is a family tradition, so I'm looking forward to winning and showing these goody-goods what it's like to be us."

"Suit yourself. Snag, let's get started before something else weird happens."

O _ur racers are already familiar with the course map and the rules, so we'll get started soon._

"Either that was the signal or someone ran over a goose," Mildew noted, hearing an odd sound.

 _As we start the race going downhill, Grape Ape has the early led. Dread Baron appears to be close to even with Speed Buggy and Tinker. It will be interesting to see both teams' strategies here._

"I'll catch that ape, you just watch!" Dread Baron exclaimed. As he accelerated, he left a cloud of exhaust behind, making Tinker and Speed Buggy cough.

 _"C_ 'mon, Speedy," Tinker said between coughs, "Use your exhaust system to clean up the air and increase your throttle."

As Speed Buggy used his exhaust system to suck of the exhaust from the Rottens' snowmobile, he acted as if he picked up a second wind and began to accelerate again.

 _As we reach the midway turn and prepare to head for the border, Dread Baron has sped his way into first place ahead of Grape Ape with Speed Buggy closing the gap between second and third._

"If I can keep the lead, I **won't** have to cheat," Dread Baron boasted.

 _But wouldn't that make you more rotten than if you did?_

"At this point, I don't think it even matters."

 _As Dread Baron makes a rare good point, he continues to hold the lead after navigating the sharp curve before the home stretch. Speed Buggy and Tinker, however, continue to narrow the gap. And what happened to Grape Ape, he's out of control, but he gets himself back on course after using a light pole to regain his balance and steer his snowmobile out of harm's way. It looks like the Scoobies are eager to challenge the Rottens for first place._

As the fans cheered, Dread Baron said, "We'll see about that, we'll floor it and cross the finish line first ahead of those goody-goods."

Unfortunately, Dread stepped on the pedal a bit too hard and it fell through a hole in the floor boards.

 _With the Rottens having rotten luck, the Scoobies have crossed the finish line first. Dread Baron coasts into second place easily, just ahead of Grape Ape whose last attempt at overtaking second place came up just short._

The remainder of the Scoobies cheered loudly at their victory.

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news—or the wolf with bad news in my case—but the Yogis have been disqualified," Mildew announced.

"What did Grape Ape do, Mildew?" Yogi asked.

"Apparently, it's considered illegal to prop yourself with a light pole to keep from skidding off-course."

"That's a tough break to take."

"Sorry!" Grape Ape apologized.

 _As we update the totals before we switch venues, the Scoobies picked up 25 points to move up to 40. The Rottens narrow second-place finish gives them 15 points to improve to 25. The Yogis received no points for their disqualification, so they remain at 25—tied with the Rottens._

"I would have never guessed touching a light post is cheating. You sure have odd rules," Sir Walter Raleigh said.

"You've seen our contestants," Mildew replied. "Odd savages deserve odd rules."

"Perhaps you're right. Anyways, thanks for having me be part of your events."

 _As we take a break from the action, stay tuned for the second half of today's exciting events at the All-Star Laff-A-Lympics._

⁂

 _Welcome back for the conclusion of today's Laff-A-Lympics. Join us in South Carolina for our surprising skeleton event, and watch our teams finish up with a tremendous effort._

 _When we left North Carolina, the Scooby Doobies led with 40 points. Both the Yogis and the Rottens had 25 points—good for a second place tie. Let's return to Mildew and Snagglepuss._

"Thanks, and welcome back, even," Snagglepuss announced. "We're still here in the mountains for our next event: the solo skeleton races."

"S...skeleton?" Scooby Doo asked, shaking in fear.

"That's right. One brave contestant will slide face down on this sled, known as a skeleton, to try to have the best time. The winner received the customary 25 points."

"And I'm here to announce our crazy contestants. We have Yakky Doodle for the Yogis. How does it feel to be named to a race again?" Mildew asked.

"Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy," Yakky replied enthusiastically.

"We'll see if you still feel as excited after the race. Over here, Shaggy appears nervous about racing for the Scoobies."

"Skeletons give me the heebie jeebies," Shaggy confessed.

"You know there's no real skeletons here. Didn't you hear Snag say that it's just the name of the sled?"

"Maybe it won't be so bad after all. But if I see a skeleton, I may set a new world record."

"That could be amusing to see, actually. Finally, we have Mr. Creepley racing for the Rottens. Creepley, what do you think about the skeleton race?"

"I think it's going to be fun. Some of my closest friends are skeletons. I even had a skeleton crew check out my sled a moment ago," he answered.

"I knew I'd regret asking that, but they pay me to be nice."

 _As you can see our course we have 16 challenging twists and turns as designed by local pretzel makers. The contestant with the best time wins the standard 25 points. Good luck, everyone! Because the Yogis and Rottens are tied, we did an off-screen tie-breaker—which the Yogis won. Yakky Doodle will be the first contestant._

"Here goes nothing," Yakky said.

"I can't bear to watch this," Yogi commented.

Yakky's nervousness showed despite being face down on the skeleton sled. However, he did his best to navigate the twists and turns at a high rate of speed.

 _Yakky finished the course with a time of 1 minute and 3.257 seconds. Next, we have Mr. Creepley for the Rottens._

"I can't see where I'm going," he said.

"Think of it this way, it's an improvement. Maybe being blind as bat for this event is a good thing," Dread Baron quipped.

"Here I goooo!"

 _And there goes Mr. Creepley. He looks like a natural on the course, but after that close call in turn 5, we'll have to see if can beat Yakky's time and make up for lost time on the rest of the track._

"I want my mummy!" Creepley wailed as he made the last turn. Finally, he crashed headfirst into the bails of hay provided for safety.

 _Thankfully, he wore his crash helmet. Even better, he made up for his mishap and finished with a time of 59.561 seconds—good enough for the lead for now. Can Shaggy beat that time?_

"I changed my mind, I don't want to do it!" Shaggy exclaimed.

Suddenly a box of Scooby Snacks appeared in front of him.

As he ate the entire box—contents and all—he said, "Alright, I'll do it. Let me at that track! I don't care if there's a whole graveyard of skeletons!"

 _Look at that, Shaggy took off without any preparation time. Let's hope his over-eagerness doesn't come back to haunt him._

"Haunt?!" Scooby asked before gulping.

 _Sorry, Scooby. Shaggy sure seems like a bat shot out of a belfry on that course. It's going to be close, I think, we'll have to wait and see what his final time is._

As Shaggy crossed the finish line and stopped his sled, he looked around and asked, "What did I just do?"

 _What you did was finish with the best time of the race: 56.296 seconds—about three seconds better than the Rottens. The Scoobies have won the skeleton competition!_

"Wow, I can't believe it! Wait till I tell Scoob."

As Shaggy turned around, however, he saw what looked like a small skeleton standing in front of him.

"Yaah! Get me out of here!"

A moment later, Mumbly removed his mask and snickered.

 _As Mumbly enjoys his scary performance, let's check what really matters: the updated scores. Shaggy's first place finish earns 25 points and moves the Scoobies up to 65 points. Mr. Creepley, with a cheat-free second place finish, moves them up to 40 points. Yakky's efforts weren't quite enough, but he earned 10 points to give the Yogis 35 points as we head into the final event._

Elsewhere, the Rottens huddled to discuss their strategy for the final event. Would they cheat and risk losing second place, or would they play fair in the final event and try to finish ahead of at least one team—if not both. Unfortunately, they chose not to reveal their decision.

⁂

Returning from the break, Snagglepuss said, "Because South Carolina is the Palmetto State, our final event is the palmetto tree climb."

"Hmm, that's curious. Climbing a tree in winter gear could be quite challenging," Mildew noted.

"That's half the challenge, Mildew."

"You're right, Snag. At least it's not something more morbid like a palmetto bug race."

"We actually thought about that, but too many people freak out over bugs."

"Thank goodness."

"Our three tree climbers will climb this tree and touch the flag at the top. The first to do that wins."

"And not only that, we're doubling the points because so much as at stake here."

"Mmm, steak," both Shaggy and Scooby said, licking their chops in near unison.

"Let's hope they're just as hungry for a win."

"Indeed, Mildew," Snagglepuss replied. "For the Yogis, we have Mr. Jinx."

"Cats are good at climbing trees. It's the getting back down that worries me," Mr. Jinx replied.

"That's easier than climbing. For the Scoobies, we have Blue Falcon. No fair flying up to the top, big fella."

"You know me better than that, Mildew," Blue Falcon replied. "I'm the epitome of sportsmanship. I wouldn't even **think** of resorting to gamesmanship."

"I know, it was just a jest."

"In that case, I'll be sure to laugh next time. My Falcon-joke Detector is in the shop right now."

"Oh boy. Let's meet the Rottens' contestant to get this over with. It looks like Junior Creepley is going to be the tree climber."

"I've climbed trees ever since I was a kid. This is as easy as feeding fish to Orful," Junior said.

Orful gurgled happily to hear his name mentioned.

"You know the rules. This likely determines our top seed, so good luck," Snagglepuss said.

At the sound of a bugle, everyone begun their attempt at climbing the tree.

 _Mr. Jinx tries to climb, but he has less traction than a garbage truck on ice, sliding back down to the start. Blue Falcon finds himself blue over his own lack of progress. Junior Creepley appears to have made it up the tree a bit... but down he goes! Grab a snack, everyone, this **could** take a while._

Members from each team encouraged their teammates and cheered them on in hopes somebody could successfully reach the top of the tree.

Mr. Jinx tried to use his claws, but the bark proved to be too thick. As he slid down the tree yet again, he said, "No wonder cats hate trees!"

Junior Creepley made it halfway up the tree, but an unseen patch of ice proved to be his downfall once his hand pressed on it and he lost his balance.

 _What's this? Blue Falcon is closing in on the flag? Is he using his Falcon climbing apparatus?_

"Of course not, my announcer friend," Blue Falcon replied. "That would be cheating and I never cheat."

 _Forget I brought it up. The only thing on the up and up is Blue Falcon who touches the flag first. That means the Scoobies will get 50 important points!_

"Blue Falcon, yahoo!" he shouted before climbing back down.

 _Meanwhile, we have a real battle between Mr. Jinks and Junior Creepley. It may come down to who has the better reach. And it's... Junior Creepley taking second place with Mr. Jinx in third. Nice try._

"I never did like climbing trees," Mr. Jinx confessed.

"Alright, Snag, lets get the final totals for the day and learn more about the playoffs," Mildew said.

 _The Scoobies get 50 points thanks to Blue Falcon's feat, and they finish with 115 points. The Rottens eked out 30 points as runners-up to finish with 70. The Yogis, with 20 points, finish with 55. The Scoobies win today's gold medal!_

To everyone's surprise, the Rottens cheered. They may not have cheated, but they did something far more shocking: the finished ahead of another team to play the role of spoilers.

Mildew pulled out his own smartphone and handed it to Snagglepuss, who read the screen.

"With the win, the Scooby Doobies pulled away to have more points than anyone, so they will be the first seed in the playoffs. The Yogis managed to finish 50 points ahead of the Rottens for the second seed. We'll see if these seeds mean anything next week," Snagglepuss told everyone.

At the award podium, Dee Dee Sykes received the gold medal for the Scoobies. Junior Creepley wore the Rottens' silver medal and Augie Doggie took the bronze medal for the Yogis.

 _That wraps up our penultimate episode, everyone. Come back next time as you won't want to miss our playoff round and season-ending ceremony. Can the Rottens play the role of spoiler again? Can the Yogis pull off a much-needed victory? Will the Scoobies finally win the ultimate prize. Tune in for the conclusion of another season of Laff-A-Lympics! Check your local listings or our social media._

⁂

 **Mock Social Media Posts**

Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed: The Scoobies win big to take the top seed in next week's #Laff-A-Lympics playoffs.

Yogi Yahooeys MyBook Account: A tough loss at the end cost us first place, but now we can prepare for next week's playoff race.

Scooby Doobies FacePlace Account: Thanks to the always-awesome Blue Falcon, we won the final event and secured first place for next week's playoffs. But what will we have to do to win next week? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Rottens Stumbler Account: We cheated, and we still won. No matter, beating those goody goods leaves them feeling Rotten, I bet. Reblog us and also like our post if you want us to cheat more next time!

⁂

 **Final Regular-Season Standings**

Scooby Doobies, 520 (3 wins, 1 tie)  
Yogi Yahooeys, 450 (0 wins, 2 ties)  
Really Rottens, 400 (1 win, 1 tie)


	7. Georgia & Washington DC

_This is it, sports fans. Today is our Laff-A-Lympic playoffs. After today's exciting event, we hope you'll stay with us as our teams and distinguished guests will partake in a season-ending banquet. We're sure everyone will have an entertaining and good time._

 _To explain our playoff event and format, let's go to our field reporters Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf. Gentlemen, take it away._

"Thanks, and welcome, even," Snagglepuss said. To wrap up the season, we'll have a singe, winner take all event."

"That's right, Snag," Mildew stated. "We'll be conducting the Giant Slalom Eliminator to determine our ultimate champions here in the Chattahoochee National Forest."

"All three teams will ski in the first slalom run. The team with the worst time will be eliminated and given third place. The remaining two teams will ski again. The team with the best combined time wins this season's championship."

"That's not all. To make things more interesting—as if that's even possible—we will have our computers pick the skiers for each run. This will ensure teams don't try anything tricky and that the teams advancing to the second run have a different skier."

"And it goes without saying that cheating today is an automatic disqualification. Should all three teams be disqualified, nobody wins and the banquet will be dutch treat."

"It's a good thing I'm **Hong Kong** Phooey," Hong Kong deadpanned.

"So much for strategy. Then again, we almost won last time we had playoffs. We can do it again and beat those goody-goods at their own game," Dread Baron said.

Mumbly snickered as the rest of the Rottens responded raucously to Dread's comment.

"Let's see who will ski the first run. Oh, that reminds me, because this is the playoffs, the Yogis are allowed to use their entire roster today. Speaking of which, Augie Doggie will ski for the Yogis."

"Make me proud, son of mine," Doggie Daddy said.

"Blue Falcon, you're the lucky randomly-selected skier for the Scoobies."

"If I can win a tree-climbing contest, I can ski. It's a good thing I ordered that extra case of Falcon Wax," Blue Falcon replied.

"And he won't fly off the deep end, either," Dynomutt said, adding a giggle.

"Finally, for the Rottens, we have Daisy Mayhem," Snagglepuss informed everyone.

"Yee haw! I'll show those other guys how it's done. I may be barefoot, but I'm ready and eager to win," Daisy said.

 _We will do the first run in reverse seeded order. This means the Rottens will go first, followed by the Yogis, and then the Scoobies. We're ready when you are, Daisy._

Daisy waited for the starting signal and the gate to release.

"Yee haw!" she screamed as she skied downhill, doing her best to clear the gates and stay on course. "There's nothing like feeling the wind through my hair."

 _But, Daisy, you're wearing a protective helmet._

"This is my skiing experience, not yours!"

 _Right. As Daisy makes the last turn and hangs on after going airborne, she clears the last gate and crosses the finish line in 1 minute and 32.69 seconds. That's not a bad time for a novice, but she'll have to wait to see if it's good enough to advance to finals. Next up, we have Augie Doggie for the Yogis._

"I'll make you proud, dear old dad!" Augie called out just before he started his race. After a near stumble out of the starting gate, he regained his composure and narrowly cleared the first gate.

"A single journey on the slopes begins with a single stumble," Doggie Daddy stated.

 _The slow start seems to have hurt Augie. While he may not beat Daisy's time, he still wants a good time to qualify for the second run. He lost some more time at the hairpin, but you never know what may happen._

The Yogis cheered as Augie finally crossed the finish line.

 _Augie's final time is 1 minute and 44.90 seconds. For now, that's good for second place. But Blue Falcon is eager to put the Scoobies into the second run._

"Win or lose, I'll have class. And I will definitely congratulate the winner," Blue Falcon said before taking his spot at the start of the course. "Here, sir. Check my poles to make sure I didn't use too much Falcon Wax."

"They look fine to me," the starting judge replied.

"Excellent. Blue Falcon, away!"

 _Look at him go. If I didn't know better, I'd say he was a natural at skiing._

"Superheroes have hobbies, too, believe it or not."

 _Of course. Blue Falcon is slightly behind the Rottens, but he's ahead of Augie. If he can maintain or improve on his current pace, he should make the finals._

"Make that big finish, B.F!" Dynomutt called out.

Blue Falcon appeared calm and he made the last jump and cleared the final gate before the finish line.

 _With a final time of 1 minute and 40.31 seconds, Blue Falcon has sent the Scoobies into the second run. Unfortunately, it also means the Scoobies are 7.69 second behind. That may pose a challenge if the want to win first place today._

"I'm sure my teammate, whomever it may be, can narrow that gap, if not overtake it," Blue Falcon stated confidently.

"I can't believe it, we may actually win today," Dread Baron stated.

"This is awkward," Mr. Creepley replied. "We're usually good at cheating, not winning. What will people say if we win? We have a reputation to think about."

"We can't cheat now. Wouldn't it be something to beat both of those other teams for a change and win a nice trophy or something."

"I suppose we could decorate it with cobwebs and bat wings."

 _We'll take a short break before we return for the final run between the Scoobies and the Rottens and an onsite interview. Don't go away!_

⁂

 _Welcome back. As we wait for adjustments to the course for the championship run, we take you to Mildew Wolf and his on-site interview. Take it away, Mildew._

"Thanks," Mildew replied. "I'm here with a super sleuth of a spectator—the fabulous Fred Jones from Mystery, Incorporated."

"Thanks, Mildew. It's nice to be here, and it's a pleasant surprise to be interviewed," Fred answered.

"So, what do you think about what you've seen so far. Surely, seeing the Yogis fail to qualify over the Rottens was more shocking than a spooky specter."

"You know, we get so used to seeing the good guys win all the time, we forget that the bad guys sometimes get a win here and there. Sure, it's disappointing to see the Yogis settle for 3rd place, but they'll bounce back. They're a great group."

"Do you have any thoughts on your teammates? Can they overcome a seven-second gap to win the championship run?"

"Mildew, when my group solved mysteries, we often teamed up with a lot of celebrities and other public figures. Scoobies team here has quite the cast, but they always seem to do well when the pressure is on—except for Shaggy maybe when he's out of Scooby Snacks. I'm sure they will give it everything they have."

"Thanks, Fred. We're about ready for the second run. Snag, let us know what's going on over there."

"Sure thing, Mildew. The course has been changed, and we're ready for the championship run," Snagglepuss informed everyone.

Members from both teams and fans cheered loudly.

"The Rottens presently have a lead of just over seven seconds, but we'll see what happens in this second run. Let's find out who our super skiers will be."

Mildew rejoined Snagglepuss and handed him a tablet with the selected contestants.

"These are going to be some unusual skiers. But we'll see what happens. Speed Buggy has been selected for the Scoobies. Tinker will be allowed to serve as his copilot."

"Golly, Speedy, can you really ski for us?" Tinker asked.

"Just... give me... snow tires... I'll do the rest," Speed Buggy sputtered in reply.

"You got it!"

As the camera returned to Snagglepuss, he added, "Sooey Pig is the selected skier for the Rottens."

Sooey oinked a number of times.

"I'm surprised as you are, Sooey," Daisy said. "But this is your big chance. Don't you want to help us win?"

Sooey oinked louder.

"Don't take that tone with me! I know we have a reputation for cheating, but we could beat those good for everything people and win that trophy."

Sooey nodded, seemingly satisfied with Daisy's explanation.

 _Alright, everyone, this is it. Speed Buggy will go first, followed by Sooey. Whoever has the lower combined time wins. Cheating or failing to finish the course properly is an automatic loss. Good luck!_

Speed Buggy took his position at the starting gate. Tinker shifted him into neutral so he could r ski the course easier. At the starting signal, he started to slide down the course with Tinker doing his best to steer him carefully yet quickly as they touched the gates.

 _Look at them glide effortlessly. This may be the first time we see a vehicle sliding on snow and ice and have it as a good thing._

"Hold on, Speedy. This last turn is tricky," Tinker stated.

"You... can... do it."

 _What amazing dexterity to steer a buggy so successfully through the final turn and gate. The Scoobies time for this run is 1 minute and 39.39 seconds. It's slightly better, but their combined time is 3 minutes, and 19.70 seconds. The Rottens only need a time of 1 minute and 47.01 seconds or better to win. Given their first one, it_ _ **could**_ _happen._

Some people cheered nervously. Others looked concerned. How weird would it be if the Rottens won today's playoffs?

Sooey took his place at the starting gate and oinked.

"Sorry, Sooey," Daisy told him. "I'd break your back if I try to ride you. Don't worry. The judges said I could give you a push to get you started. You got this easy, Sooey. Just finish the course and you got it made."

Sooey oinked loudly after receiving Daisy's push when he least expected it. Not having ski poles, he had to rely on shifting his weight to navigate the course and go through the gates.

 _This is an impressive exhibition. Sooey is competing the course and has the time to actually win it. We appear to be seeing history in the making._

"You're telling me. I've seen pigs fly, but never ski," Mildew deadpanned.

 _Sooey continues his progress but what's this? Sooey lost his balance and veered off course at the hairpin. That's going to cost time, but more importantly, he has to get back on course to make the next gate, or he's out!_

Sooey oinked frantically—desperate to regain his bearings. Somehow, he manged to get back on course and narrowly grazed the next grate.

 _Sooey showed some dexterity, but his time advantage has really taken a hit, it's going to be close, folks. Let's see what happens._

Despite the downhill nature of the course, Sooey felt himself slowing down slightly. Undaunted, the rest of the Rottens started to cheer him on.

 _Here's the finish, Sooey's time will be close... he finishes with a time of 1 minute, 48.29 seconds. It's too high! The Scoobies will win the event with a margin of 1.28 seconds._

The Scoobies looked on in shock. Perhaps it wasn't an upset to defeat the Rottens, but it was unexpected.

 _This is amazing. Sooey's mishaps on the course cost the Rottens. However, they did finish as playoff runners up._

"I can't say anything to top that, folks. See you in Washington for the banquet," Mildew said, visibly flustered.

⁂

Teams, guest judges, and other distinguished guests gathered in the White House for what appeared to be the traditional season-ending banquet. Servers dressed in colonial-era clothing brought food and drinks to the guests' tables until all had their fill.

With most of the crowd finishing dessert, Snagglepuss rose from the table for distinguished guests and walked over to the podium.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we'd like to start the ceremony portion of the night. The sooner we finish, the sooner everyone can enjoy themselves afterwards," Snagglepuss told those assembled. In addition, media chose to broadcast this portion of the banquet.

"First, we have the main awards we're required to give out. Mildew, give me a hand. The Largest Laff goes to the top team in the regular season. This season, it goes to the Scooby Doobies."

Shaggy walked up to the podium to receive the award from Mildew, saying, "Thanks. It was great to be on top. I can't remember if we won any of those food bonuses you had, but it's always nice to taste victory."

"You tell 'em, Shaggy!" Scooby called out.

Snagglepuss looked on as Mildew took the next award to be presented before saying, "Next, we have the Silver Star for our second place regular season team: the Yogi Yahooeys."

Yogi, shaking Mildew's hand, simply told those gathered, "I wish we were better than the average team, but things don't turn out as they seem."

"Short and to the point. I like that," Mildew interjected.

"Indeed," Snagglepuss replied. "Our final regular season award is the Wooden Spoon. The Really Rottens are repeat winners. Come on up and get your spoon."

Mr. Creepley came up to receive the award, much to many's surprise.

"Thanks. It's nice to be consistent, even with all the good play we did this year. That was difficult. Now that we have two spoons, maybe I can start my food truck idea."

"What idea is that?" Mildew asked nervously.

"Fillet of Bat Wing King."

"I knew I'd regret asking that."

"Let's stay on schedule," Snagglepuss reminded Mildew. "We don't want to have to cancel your fun part of the evening, do we? Before that, I have one last award to present. Everyone from the Scooby Doobies can came up to receive this season's championship cup."

With all 13 team members together holding the trophy, many of the seated guests took pictures to remember the moment or post to social media.

"With the main awards given out, I'll turn to Mildew for his combined presentation of the season and his own mock awards he came up with for tonight."

"Thanks, Snag," Mildew replied. "As you can see from my StrongDot presentation, we had some interesting venues and guest judges. I think most if not all of them are here tonight. Be sure to thank them for their efforts, especially with the silliness and cheating they had to observe."

The audience laughed to see players caught cheating or photographed in awkward situations—such as Orful being pecked by a Rhode Island Red.

"Speaking of which, I came up with my very own Hall of Infamy Team for those that got caught cheating or had to be disqualified. As you see your picture, come on up for a certificate."

One by one, Dirty Dalton, Mr. Creepley, Dread Baron, Dynomutt, and Grape Ape came up to receive certificates and have their pictures taken together.

"Some people make history. Others go down in it. Time will tell what happens to you. Go ahead and go back to your seats."

Resuming his presentation, Mildew added, "And, we had our share of surprises this season, too. The Rottens actually tried to win more, resulting in an outright win and a tie for first place. Imagine that. They also defeated the Yogis in the playoffs. So, my last award of the night is the Season Surprise awarded to the Rottens for their improbable glimpses of good sportsmanship."

Some Rottens groaned, but most cheered and applauded along with the audience.

"Gee, Mildew," Dread Baron said, taking the certificate. "You certainly know how to put us on the spot. Playing by the rules was so painful and out of character. But watching my team outscore the others was so darn funny at times, I couldn't help enjoy it. Maybe we can actually win the playoffs next time."

"That would be interesting, wouldn't it. Anyways, this is the end of my presentation. Thanks for the interesting season. Now, I have to decide if I want to retire or rejoin the West Coast Weasels as their team mascot and spokeswolf."

"That concludes our presentation and another exciting season. Thanks for being part of it and supporting us, even," Snagglepuss told everyone.

 _So, there we have it. Another Laff-A-Lympics season has wrapped up with the Scoobies winning both the regular season title and the playoffs. Will our teams assemble again, or will they retire on a desert island where the only competition will be seeing who naps more? Only time can tell. Thank you for watching Laff-A-Lympics: The Colonial Challenge._

⁂

 **Final Mock Social Media Posts**

Official LAL Bogus Chirper Feed: The Scoobies manage to battle back against the Rottens for this season's #Laff-A-Lympics playoff championship. See more pictures on our profile page.

Yogi Yahooeys MyBook Account: We're not upset about our playoff upset against the Rottens. We can bear our shortcomings and hope to do better next time.

Scooby Doobies FacePlace Account: Speed Buggy lived up to his nickname of Speedy with his big win in the playoffs. Who knew buggies could ski so fast? Here is our group photo with the Championship Cup.

Rottens Stumbler Account: We played hard, We cheated, We finished last, but we still came close to beating both teams in the playoffs. We even had players get recognized for their cheating! How awesome is that? Tell us what you think our strategy should be if we do this again: cheat, cheat, cheat or try to take the top spot. Likes, reblogs, and inquiries are encouraged!

⁂

 **Closing Commentary**

First, I'm very happy I finished writing the draft version of this story **before** the Winter Olympics end. I had started writing this last summer, but my progress over the past seven months was slow due to offline activities and the lack of a more pressing deadline—for better or for worse. Still, I enjoyed writing this story. Partway though, I realized I should pay more of a tribute to the winter games during which I concurrently posted this. So, I added an unexpected overnight snowstorm and included as many silly versions of events normally seen during the regular Winter Olympics.

Although there may be subtle references to my previous virtual season, _Laff-A-Lympics: The Global Games_ , my intent was for this season to be a standalone season where one doesn't need to read my previous Laff-A-Lympics stories to know what to expect here.

While there may be merit in the cliche saying, "Never say never," I currently intend for this story to be my final one in the Laff-A-Lympics universe. Finding events and venues that don't repeat with others from both the original cartoon and my other writing is a challenge. Also, I'm busier offline now than I have been in years past. Perhaps those that have enjoyed these stories of mine may be inspired to try their hand at writing their own?

Also, I hope I didn't have the Rottens act too out of character in their occasional attempts to win legitimately. I still laugh at their attempted cheat during the model shipbuilding where they learned not only were their actions acceptable, they also helped them earn an outright win over the other two teams! Such rotten luck, huh? Still, I wanted to show the team was aware of their need to try to earn points while not totally abandoning their underhanded ways that defined their very being.

Finally, thanks to everyone that took time to read or otherwise support this story. As always, it's appreciated.

END


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